


The Descent Into Hell Is Easy

by The_Jade_Goblin



Series: The Immortals That Be [1]
Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Malec, Saphael, major angst, with fluff sewn in between
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-29
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-05 06:01:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6692443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Jade_Goblin/pseuds/The_Jade_Goblin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alec is desperate to rescue his parabati from the clutches of Valentine, and Magnus is all too willing to help him. Alec is willing to sacrifice anything to save Jace, but when that sacrifice becomes Magnus himself, Alec is faced with a terrible choice. His decision will affect the future of Downworlders and Shadowhunters alike, and his relationship with his family, and Magnus, will never be the same.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Battle was something Alec was used to. He’d been fighting demons since he could walk, always running after Jace – running after his shadow as far as he was concerned – he set himself up as the family protector early, knowing he’d never be as fast or as strong or as deadly as Jace or Izzy, so he was the defence, the last line, the protection against certain death when things got bad. He was raised a soldier. But he’d never lost someone in battle before. They all knew a Shadowhunter’s fate was to die young, usually slain by a demon on a mission gone wrong, though these days it was far more likely they’d be killed by the Circle and Valentine. Losing Jace to Valentine was killing Alec, he’d never lost anyone before, he always worked hard to keep his family together, and now Jace was gone, in the clutches of a man so evil the Devil himself would cringe.

He knew he wasn’t the only one affected, Izzy and Clary were holding up barely better than him. Clary had her mother to lean on right now, and Izzy could always lean on Alec’s shoulder when she needed. And Alec?

“Alexander you’ve been staring at that same hole in the wall for an hour.” A sigh sounded from behind him.

Well, Alec had Magnus.

The warlock in question stalked around to stand in front of Alec, clicking his fingers in front of his face, making the young Shadowhunter blink and focus on him, his ears dully picking up the sound of his voice.

“My dear Alexander I insist you get out of here, for an hour at least, you need air, this is not healthy.” Magnus was saying.

Alec blinked a few times to focus his eyes, gaze lowering from Magnus’ face to the table he was currently leaning over, a table strewn with maps, spell-books and an all-manner of documents and magical artefacts.

“It’s been two weeks Magnus, he’s still out there.” Alec rumbled.

“I know that, and I know how much you’re worried. But if didn’t find him yesterday, or the day before, or the day before that, the chances of you finding him today are slim.” Magnus said hesitantly.

“I can’t just –”

“I’m not telling you to give up. I’m telling you to take a breath.” Magnus interrupted.   

“Valentine won’t be taking a breath. He’ll be on the move, preparing, poisoning Jace against himself even more.” Alec said.

Magnus sighed. “You’re not going to want to hear this, but I know Valentine, or at least how he works. If he doesn’t want to be found, he’s not going to be found. At least not until he’s ready for a fight. He’s ruthless but not reckless like you Shadowhunters, and you are no help to anyone half-dead on your feet. Suppose you found Jace right now, in your condition could you really help him? Would you really be able to put up a fight against a Circle member, against Valentine?”

Alec slid his eyes in Magnus’ direction, sighed, and looked back down. He knew he was right. He couldn’t remember the last time he slept. Izzy had chastised about that last night – or had it been this morning? – and even Clary had brought him food on more than one occasion over the last two weeks, as if she knew Alec hadn’t eaten all day. He knew he was right, they were all right, but he didn’t have to agree with them. He needed to find Jace, he couldn’t abandon him, any second could be his breakthrough, any moment he could connect the missing puzzle piece, connect the dots and find him. But Valentine left no trail, nothing with which to track. Alec wouldn’t risk using his parabati bond, as weak as it was it would surely kill them both to use it now. Magnus had tried to track Valentine four times, at Alec’s request, but each time it just left the warlock more drained than the last, and with no results. He couldn’t help but feel guilty for making Magnus do that, even if the warlock assured him he would do anything to help.

Between searching for Jace, running the Institute and training, Alec had spent very little time with Magnus. Of course Magnus understood that, but Alec couldn’t help but notice he was beginning to distance himself from him again. Did Magnus think Alec was no longer interested? Was he preparing to take a back seat to Jace? Or was it his way of respecting Alec’s space and understanding his current dilemma in losing his parabati? Alec straightened up, and looked down at Magnus.

The warlock was looking up at him with concern radiating from his dark eyes. Alec noticed he was playing nervously with his fingers, an anxious tick Alec hadn’t expected to find in someone as confident as Magnus. He realised he didn’t know when Magnus had entered the room. How long had he been there watching him? Worrying about him? Guilt hit him. He suddenly felt extremely tired. Not only that, but he felt like crying. Alec didn’t cry often, hadn’t cried since he was a kid. But losing Jace, his parent’s disappointment, Magnus’ hesitation, Lydia’s injury, Hodge’s betrayal, everything was becoming too much to handle. Alec had never once shirked his duty or complained about the weight on his shoulders, he took it and shouldered it and dealt with it, getting his job done, not letting himself feel anything at all. But now, he wanted nothing more than to hold Magnus and bury his face in his hair, letting himself feel, reminding himself that here was someone who cared, someone who worried, someone who wouldn’t be disappointed in him if he broke down.

It was just what Alec ended up doing. Magnus started in surprised when Alec suddenly grabbed him and pulled him against him, but he didn’t pull back. He caught on to what Alec needed quickly, and had his arms around his waist in a minute, just letting him work through his emotion in silence. Alec never thought just holding another person could make him feel so much better, but it did just that. Magnus was heavy and warm against him, his hair soft against his cheek.

“I’m not okay.” He whispered, like he was ashamed of admitting it.

“I know.” Magnus murmured back. “And I wish I could do something to help you,”

“You do help.” Alec sighed, squeezing Magnus slightly. “You _are_ helping.”

He let go of Magnus, albeit reluctantly, and Magnus reached up to cup Alec’s cheek in his hand.

“We will find Jace,” he said firmly. “I promise.”

“You can’t exactly promise that,” Alec said weakly.

“I can and I will. Warlocks never go back on their promises. I will do everything in my power to help you find Jace, and we will save him from Valentine. Even if it’s the last thing I do I _will_ get your parabati back.”

Magnus’ dark eyes flashed golden green for a moment, so serious was he in his promise that it made Alec shiver.

“Don’t say that,” he whispered. “It won’t be the last thing you do,”

Magnus ran his thumb across Alec’s cheek gently. “It’s merely an expression my dear.”

“Still, I don’t like the idea of you dying Magnus. I – I don’t want to lose you so quickly,”

Magnus smiled. “Nor do I want to lose you Alexander, so you need to be at 100% when you face Valentine, to make sure you’ll come back to me.”

Alec exhaled, and nodded, reaching a hand up to cover Magnus’ as it left his cheek.

“Just a little break then,” he relented.

Magnus beamed, and Alec didn’t feel as bad for leaving Jace out of his thoughts for a moment.

“My place then?” Magnus asked.

“Angel yes, get me the hell out of this place before I go crazy,” Alec muttered, rubbing his face with his hands.

Magnus laughed. “It would be my absolute pleasure Alexander. Now let’s hurry before your mother notices I’m here.”

Magnus came often to the Institute these days to help the others in their search, but every time he did, Maryse had something to say. Magnus had taken to refusing to even acknowledge her lately, even going as far as to talk to her through other people present in the room. Alec wanted to come to Magnus’ defence, but he was timid in front of his mother’s glare, like he’d always been, even as an adult that glare shut him up permanently. Magnus needed no protecting, however it was irritating Alec that Magnus had to constantly live through being talked down to like he was an animal. Magnus didn’t seem to let it bother him, though Alec knew better. But a whispered apology and a kiss from Alec tended to make the warlock smile again.

Alec hadn’t realised how tired he was until he got to Magnus’ loft, and he certainly didn’t remember falling asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Alec woke to the sound of running water. The shower, his brain sleepily supplied. It took him a few moments to notice he was warm, and on something soft. Slowly, he opened one eye. This was certainly not his bedroom, if the bright colours and scattered jewellery were anything to go by. Vaguely, he heard humming coming from down the hall, most likely from the person in the shower.

Magnus.

He was in Magnus’ bed. Magnus’ room. Magnus’ _loft_. And at this moment Magnus was in the shower while Alec _slept in his bed._  

Alec shot up, head whipping wildly from side to side as he took in his surroundings. He’d never been inside Magnus’ bedroom before, he had only seen glimpses of it from the living room. The four-poster bed he was currently sitting on was grand, covered in dark red silk sheets. Although looking at it, it seemed far too large for one person. Alec felt himself frown slightly at the thought of Magnus being all alone in a bed far too big for him. From the sun creeping through the semi-drawn curtains, he deduced it was early afternoon. How long had he been asleep? _When_ had he fallen asleep? He remembered Magnus making drinks, and reading on the couch while Magnus played with his hair, and Magnus laughing at his stupid jokes, and he especially remembered holding Magnus’ hand as he finished up a bit of paperwork for a client. But he didn’t remember falling asleep.   

“I thought you’d be more comfortable here than on the couch like last time,” Magnus voice sounded from the doorway, and Alec turned his head to see the warlock entering the room, casually towel-drying his hair as he came to stand in front of his full-length mirror.

“How long have I been asleep?” Alec asked, watching the warlock intently as he brushed the towel through his dark locks.

“Only a few hours.” Magnus answered.

_Hours?!_

“ _Hours_? I’m sorry –”

“You’re exhausted Alexander, it was no trouble. I wanted you to get some rest, so I let you sleep.” Magnus said turning his head. “Trust me, seeing you resting is far more comforting to me right now.”

“Still,” Alec mumbled, looking embarrassed.

Magnus chuckled, tucked his towel around his neck, and came to sit on the side of the bed, grinning at Alec.

“My darling there’s no need to be sorry, not when I get the benefit of watching you rest _and_ seeing you in my bed. It’s very much a win-win for me,” he winked.  

Alec seemed to choke on air, blushing and looking down at his hands as Magnus laughed softly.

“How are you feeling Alec? Better?” Magnus murmured, brushing his hand gently over Alec’s forehead, and trailing down to caress his cheek.

Alec nodded, and Magnus smiled.

“Good. I was getting worried. But you’re up now, and you’re looking much better.”

Magnus got off the bed and went to sit at his vanity, Alec making himself comfortable as he watched his – boyfriend? I guess – fix his hair. Ultimately, Magnus elected to take a nap. And by nap, he meant crawl into bed with Alec and cuddle with him. Which Alec didn’t mind, he’d never actually done something like this with anyone, and it was surprising peaceful, just having Magnus laying in his arms, watching his head rise and fall with Alec’s chest and he breathed. He found himself studying the warlock, making sure to notice how Magnus’ nose would crinkle when he yawned, the tiny smile on his lips when Alec ran his hand through his hair, the soft snuffling sound he made when he nuzzled closer to Alec for warmth. Everything the warlock did was utterly adorable, and Alec was content to watch him as he fell asleep against him. His soft, rhythmic breathing eventually lulled Alec back to sleep too, and he slept peacefully for the first time in days.

But it wasn’t to last.

The call came in at about 2am, the shrill tune of Alec’s phone forcing the pair of them to wake, groggy and disorientated, as Alec blindly groped for the phone. Ignoring Magnus’ annoyed grumbles, Alec blinked to keep his eyes open as he answered the call.

“Hello?” he yawned.

“Alec I’m so sorry to bother you, but where are you right now?” Izzy’s voice came through the other end, sounding panicked and out of breath.

Alec frowned, and sat up, forcing Magnus to sit as well. The warlock clung to Alec as he spoke, looking up at the Shadowhunter in concern.

“I’m with Magnus, why? Izzy what’s wrong, you sound upset.” Alec said.

“Oh thank the Angel I thought you might be out on patrol.” Izzy said. “I’m fine, it’s just – well – Raphael just came to the Institute, he was all bloody and being chased by something, he came to warn us that Circle members were beginning to surround the Institute, they’ve already begun attacking Downworlders during the night.”

“What?” Alec cried. “Where are you? Are you okay?”

“We’re fine, the Institute’s safe for now. Simon went back to the Hotel with Raphael to protect the vampires, and Clary’s mom went to warn Luke. Everyone’s driven the Circle back, and I wasn’t going to bother you but Clary told me she might have found a lead to finding Jace.”

“A lead? What lead?” Alec asked urgently.

“Clary got one of the Circle members to talk before Simon killed him. He said Valentine and his ‘son’ were rousing their troops and rounding up Downworlders in a warehouse on the wharf. I think he meant Jace, and it’s the best lead we’ve had in weeks. It’s dangerous, the Circle is still out there, but Clary and I are going to go and find them, I knew you’d want to help too.” Izzy explained.

“I’ll be right there Iz, stay where you are I’ll meet you in a minute,” Alec hung up, and tried to ignore the way Magnus was looking at him.

Magnus let him go as he got up, and hurried to get dressed and collect his gear.

“You’re going after Jace?” Magnus asked quietly.

“Yeah, Clary think she’s found a good lead. Apparently the Circle has started going after Downworlders, so we’re going to their base of operations to find Jace.” Alec explained briefly.

Magnus’ face contorted into a scowl as he watched Alec getting ready.

“And you three are just going to charge in and take on the entire Circle single-handedly? Are you insane?” Magnus got out of bed and stalked after Alec, who was rushing out of the room and into the living room to find his bow.

“It might not be the smartest thing to do, but it’s the only choice.” Alec said.

“It’s suicide! You’ll be killed the second you walk in the building! Alec you have to see this is crazy! Even the most seasoned Shadowhunters can’t compete with Valentine, and you think the three of you can handle him?” Magnus cried.

“I don’t care about him right now, all I care about is finding Jace, and getting him out.”

“He’ll be with Valentine, which means you’ll have to confront him, which means you’ll _die_!”

“Magnus I’m not asking for you permission, or your opinion.” Alec muttered, slipping his Seraph blades into his belt.

Magnus glared. “I’m coming with you.”

Alec whirled around. “What? No, Magnus it’s too –”

“Alexander Lightwood I am centuries old I can hold my own in battle,” Magnus interrupted. “I fought at the first Uprising I know what I’m doing, it’s you foolish idiots that I’m worried about. You’re going to get yourselves killed this way, so I’m coming with you to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“Magnus…”

“Don’t make me lose you Alexander,” Magnus whispered, almost desperately, as he reached up to cup Alec’s cheek. “I won’t lose you. Not now, not like this.”

Alec took a shuddering breath as Magnus released him, and disappeared into his bedroom. He came out dressed and ready for anything, a grim look on his face as his eyes transitioned into his golden-green feline eyes, and nodded at Alec. Alec took a breath, and walked out the door, Magnus barely a step behind him.

“We’re meeting Izzy and Clary by the Jade Wolf. Luke and his pack want to help,” Alec said over his shoulder.

“If he’s targeting Downworlders, going with an entire host of them isn’t a good idea. There’s no way we’d slip in unnoticed,” Magnus said.

“Luke can provide a distraction while we get in another way.” Alec said grimly.

Magnus had a sour look on his face at that. He didn’t like the idea of abandoning fellow Downworlders like that, and honestly neither did Alec. They shared a look that said everything. This was now war, and sometimes there had to be sacrifices.

“Why is always the Downworlders?” Magnus murmured in response to the unuttered agreement between them.

“I won’t let them get killed,” Alec promised. “The only ones that die tonight are the Circle, and Valentine.”

Magnus sighed, but nodded. “Try not to get us all killed tonight darling, we’re far too pretty to die.”

Alec laughed breathlessly, as he saw Izzy waving to him on the horizon.

“There they are. Let’s go.”

Magnus set his jaw. “Show time.” he muttered.

Why did he let himself be dragged into Shadowhunter drama all the time?


	3. Chapter 3

They were used to battle. Ready for it. Looking around, Magnus remembered a time not so long ago when a different set of Shadowhunters stood before him, ready to fight against the Circle, and Valentine. Most of the Shadowhunters around him now weren’t even born then, and many of the ones before did not come back. He wouldn’t let the same thing happen here. He looked at the young faces, the faces of his friends, and swore he wouldn’t lose any of them tonight. Magnus had lost far too many good people to the Circle already.

“Luke and his pack are down by the docks, ready for our signal.” Izzy said. “They’ll make sure to get the Circle’s attention when we’re in position, they’ll keep the focus off us so we can sneak in the backway. Clary and I have already scouted the area, there should be a lot more inside, so once we get in, we need to be quick. It won’t take long for someone to raise the alarm and for that whole building to be in chaos.”

“You found a way in?” Magnus asked.

“We think so. At the back there’s a door, what looks like a cellar. We can use that to enter the building. But there are guards patrolling in that area, so we’ll have to be careful.” Clary replied.

Alec half-drew his bow. “No sense waiting around then, let’s do this.”

Izzy nodded, and took out her whip. She cracked it once, hard. The sound would travel and be heard by the werewolves and their superior hearing, acting as their signal. Almost at once, howling was heard, and the sound of battle. Nodding to the others, Alec led their party through the shadows, towards the back entrance of the warehouse.

 _So young to be fighting so many_ , Magnus thought.  

He looked to Clary, and saw her mother in her. The grim determination set into her jaw, her grip on her Seraph blade. But he also found her father in the cold stare of her eyes, the confident way in which she strode through the dark. Clary had potential, he saw that. He had no doubt she would grow up to be just as dangerous as Valentine. He hoped the part of her that was Jocelyn would keep her on their side however, for the little girl that played with faeries he’d once known was gone, replaced with a battle-hardened young woman, her mind focused and ruthless.

Izzy and Alec reminded him of the many Lightwoods he’d met in the past in that moment. They had a purpose to their steps, no mercy on their faces, weapons at the ready for whatever may come. He hoped for a better ending to this fragile parabati relationship that what he’d witnessed in the past. He didn’t know what it meant to have a parabati, but if warlocks had them, Ragnor would have most definitely been his. And he’d watched him die. Magnus was determined to not let Alec go through the same thing, it would destroy him.

He saw Clary draw a rune on her arm, sharpening her eyesight as she scouted the terrain. She crouched low as the party came to a pause, hiding in the bushes just beyond the fence that marked Valentine’s territory.

“There’s the guards, and see there’s the entrance we’re heading for.” Clary said pointing out their objectives.  

Izzy quickly counted them. “Five.” She reported. “Shouldn’t be a problem, but we’ll need to take them out all at once or one will raise the alarm,”

“How will we get to all of them at the same time without being seen? There’s not a lot of cover between here and there,” Alec said.

“I recognise that man,” Clary suddenly said, eyes narrowing as she squinted at a guard.

“You do?” Izzy asked.

“He’s the one that hurt Raphael, I remember his eyes. I’m sure of it.” Clary replied.

Magnus’ expression shifted into a glare. “In that case, leave this to me.” he growled.

“Magnus?” Alec blinked. “There’s too many, you can’t –”

“Alexander, if there is one thing you should never do, is _never_ underestimate me.” Magnus cut off. “I haven’t lived for centuries and learned nothing. Raphael is a dear friend of mine, and I’ve had enough of the Circle hurting my friends. Leave them to me,”

Alec pressed his lips together, not happy but not arguing either. Magnus slinked out from behind the bushes, and with a click of his fingers, transformed into a black cat. As a cat he ran across the grass to the concrete parking lot beyond the fence, making sure his pattern of travel was as random as could be, simulating a real cat’s run. The Circle paid him no attention. The fools. In his new form he ran past each and every guard, marking them with his magic with a blink of his golden-green eyes. When eventually he slinked up to the guard Clary had pointed out, he set his paws on the ground determinedly, and transformed.

As soon as he was human again, magic rushed to his fingers as he held his hands up behind the guards head, shocking him and making him fall down, dead. The others quickly caught on to what was happening, but Magnus was too quick. Having already marked them with his magic, he was able to magically phase from location to location, burning them and pushing them back with his blue flames, dodging their blades and knocking them down dead, without ever putting his hands on any of them.

When the deed was done, he waved the others down, and together they carefully hid the bodies in the shadows to avoid suspicion.

“That was incredible Magnus,” Clary breathed.

Magnus shrugged.

“I’m not even going to lie, that was kind of hot,” Alec muttered as he walked past, just loud enough for Magnus to hear. The warlock smirked at him.

Izzy broke open the lock on the cellar door with her whip, and Alec held the doors open as they ducked down into the tunnel. Alec closed the door behind them, and lit a witch-light to help them see.

“Alright, remember we stay together, okay? If we have to separate, make your way back here and we’ll regroup. I for one am not leaving until we have everyone back. If you have Circle members on your tail, get out of here and find the wolf pack.” Alec instructed.

The others nodded, and quietly they sneaked through the cellar and up into the main building. The warehouse was essentially empty, just a large space filled with nothing. No Shadowhunters, no Valentine, no Jace, no nothing. The group formed a circle, eyes in every space, covering every exit, but they saw nothing. Heard nothing either. It was strange, where was everyone?

“Clary…” Alec said. “Are you sure your Intel was correct?”

“This is where he said,” Clary said, looking confused. “I’m sure…”

“It’s a trap.” Magnus whispered, suddenly realising the danger they were in.

Clary whirled around as Magnus said that, and watched in horror as scores of Circle members poured in from the main entrance.

“Luke and his pack were out there…” she breathed. “Are they…?”

“They’re not dead biscuit, they’re not dead.” Magnus said urgently, turning back to her and gripping her arm. “But we will be if we don’t get the hell out of here now!”

“We have to find Jace!” Izzy cried.

“You heard Magnus, it’s a setup. There’s no guarantee Jace is even here, he probably isn’t!” Alec said, notching an arrow in his bow and hitting an oncoming Shadowhunter in between the eyes. “We have to get out of here!”  

Izzy curled her whip around a Circle member’s ankle and pulled him to the ground, just as Magnus threw blue fire at another. There was too many of them, there was no way they’d be able to fight them off for long. This whole thing had been for nothing.

_“Alec!”_

Alec whipped around at the cry of his name, but couldn’t find the owner of the voice. Izzy’s eyes went wide as she recognised the voice.

“ _Izzy! Clary!”_ the voice cried on.

“JACE!” Alec screamed, looking around wildly.

_“Alec!”_

“That’s him! It’s Jace!” Clary cried.

“I don’t see him! Where is he?” Izzy said, taking down another Shadowhunter as she looked around.

“Upstairs, it’s got to be upstairs!” Alec pointed to the staircase on the left.

“Alec it might be a trick!” Magnus warned. “Don’t go!”

Alec looked back at Magnus apologetically. “I have to try.” He said.

“Alec!” Magnus shouted as Alec ran off towards the stairs. He would have gone after him if not for the Shadowhunters bearing down upon them.

With an inhuman growl, Magnus let out blue sparks, and a line of blue fire stood between them and the enemy. He stepped up to the flames, feline eyes flashing.

“Go after Alec,” he told the girls. “I’ll hold them back.”

“But Magnus –!” Clary gasped.

“Go! I’ll be alright.” Magnus ordered. “Go find Jace! I’ll be right behind you!”

Reluctantly, the girls left Magnus and ran after Alec, calling the stairs two at a time to catch up to him.  

“Jace! Alec!” Clary cried as they ran down what seemed like an endless hallway at the top of the stairs.

“Alec! Alec _where are you_?” Izzy shrieked, her panic building the longer she couldn’t see her brother.

“Alec!” Clary shouted. “ _Jace_!”

_“Clary!”_

“That way!” Izzy cried triumphantly, pointing in the direction of the voice.

The girls took a right, and ran down another hallway until they came to a large empty room. As soon as they got inside, the door slammed behind them. Clary gasped and threw herself at the door, but it wouldn’t budge.

“Don’t scratch the wood girls, it’s pure oak.”

The girls froze, and turned around.

“Valentine.” Clary hissed.

“Now now, is that anyway to greet your father?” Valentine gave a sickeningly sweet smile.

“You’re no father of mine!” Clary snapped. “What have you done with Jace and Alec?”

“Give me my brothers back!” Izzy shrieked, glaring defiantly at Valentine as he pretended to wince.

“No need to shout girls, they’re right here, safe and sound.” He said.

He seemed to unlock something on the wall, for a second later Jace and Alec came tumbling out of a closet, stumbling to the ground. Clary gave a shout and flung herself down by Jace, and Alec got himself up as Izzy reached him, nodding to her to let her know he was okay.

“And here we are, one big happy family,” Valentine smiled.

“What’s to stop me from killing you right here?” Alec scowled. “I don’t see any of your henchmen around,”

“You try that Alexander, and my men around the Institute may suddenly get the order to attack,” Valentine said simply.

“You son of a bitch,” Alec glared. “Not content with destroying the Downworld, you want to destroy your own people too.”

“Don’t compare us to this filth Alec,” Izzy scoffed. “We’re above him.”

“Yes, your parents thought that too.” Valentine chuckled. “The Lightwoods have always thought themselves so superior.”

Izzy lifted her chin in defiance. “And you’re better?”

“Well, the latest editions to the Lightwood family have been a disappointment at the very least. To think you two had so much potential, yet you throw away all your talent in favour of the enemy.”

“The enemy?” Jace looked to his siblings. “What enemy exactly?”

“Why, the Downworlders of course. I know all about your escapades with them. Spawns of demons the lot of them, they are evil stains on this earth that need to be eradicated. Your parents understood that. But just look at their children, little Izzy, so sure of herself, sleeping around with Seelies to spite her mother.”

Izzy grit her teeth.

“And the firstborn Alec, always so dutiful, until a warlock made you into the new family disappointment.”

Alec glared, tightening his grip on his bow. _Keep talking and you’ll get an arrow in the face._

“Don’t you see these Downworlders are ruining your lives? What your parents think of you now, so disappointed and upset, is all because of them and their poisonous lifestyles, infecting you and turning you against the rest of us.” Valentine went on.

Alec couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He didn’t know what was crazier, that Valentine actually believed what he was saying, or that he was trying to convince the rest of them of the same thing. As if that would ever happen. Magnus made Alec’s life better not worse. Sure his parents disagreed with it, but Alec knew for sure he was much happier being who he was, with Magnus, than living a lie.

“You could all leave that behind you know. Clary, you’ve got your mom and your brother back, Izzy you’ve got your adoptive brother back, and Alec you’ve been reunited with your parabati. All I want is my family back, but you two are quite welcome. Johnathon is quite fond of you after all,”

“His name is Jace.” Alec spat.

“And we will never join you.” Izzy added.

Valentine nodded. “I understand.”

The others blinked.

“It’s the Downworld’s influence on you that’s holding you back. I understand. But that’s easily remedied, I’ll just have to remove that influence. No more Downworlders, no more influence.”

Almost as if his words were a cue, suddenly a gut-wrenching, pain-filled scream was heard, echoing through the silent warehouse like an alarm. Clary’s stomach churned at the sound, and even Jace shivered. But Alec’s heart stopped, his blood running ice cold. He knew who that screamed belonged to.

_“MAGNUS!”_


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> told myself this wasn't going to have saphael in it, but then this happened. I'm trash I can't help it I'm sorry.

Simon scrolled through his phone, sighing as he dully watched the time tick by. It was nearly dawn, or it was already dawn, it was hard to tell with the blacked out windows of Hotel Dumort. But the tiredness in his bones told him the sun was definitely up. But he couldn’t go to sleep, he had a very important job, one he entrusted to no other, not that any of the vampires really trusted him at this point either. Why they hadn’t already torn him apart was a mystery to Simon, it’s not as if Raphael would care.

Speaking of Raphael, the vampire in question made a soft noise as he stirred in the bed. Simon knew Raphael didn’t like sleeping in beds, they made him feel to exposed and vulnerable, came with centuries of sleeping in caskets. But his injuries had been grave, and Simon wanted him to not be confined, in case he needed something. Simon wasn’t an expert, but he’d taken first aid in highschool, and he’d patched Raphael up as best he could. He supposed there were vampires in the building with better medical knowledge than him, but he didn’t want anyone but him to do the deed. The vampire stirred again, mumbling under his breath. Simon almost smiled, it was cute.

“Simon?”

Raphael’s voice was barely above a whisper, but Simon’s sharp hearing picked it up, and he raised his head to look over at the older vampire.

“Yes Raphael?” he asked.

Raphael frowned slightly, a confused expression on his face that Simon found adorable.

“What is it Raph?” he asked again.

Raphael frowned further. “Why…are you…here?” he murmured.

“You were badly hurt, remember? When you came to warn us,” Simon explained.

“Yes but…you’re…here…” Raphael closed his eyes. “I must be dreaming,” he whispered.

“You often dream of me huh?” Simon joked.

“ _Idiota_ ,” Raphael muttered.

Simo grinned at him, but his smile faded as Raphael continued to stare at him like he was in fact a dream.

“Raph? Are you okay?”

Raphael blinked slowly. “Simon…”

“Raphael,” Simon was growing worried. He got up and sat on the side of the bed, looking down at Raphael in concern. “What’s wrong? Why do you look so distressed?”

Raphael looked up at him, and slowly raised a hand to touch his cheek. Simon froze, but didn’t pull away as Raphael’s fingers caressed his skin.

“I thought you were gone forever,” he whispered. “I thought I wouldn’t get to see you again. You came back.”

“Of course I did,” Simon breathed. “I had to make sure you were okay.”

Raphael frowned, and lowered his hand. “Why…?”

“Why? Did you ask me why?” Simon shook his head. “You stupid vampire. Why do you think?”

Raphael shrugged with one shoulder, eyes darting down. It would be cute if it wasn’t so frustrating. Since when did Raphael act like this?

“I came back because I wanted to take care of you,” Simon murmured. “I was worried about you. I _care_ about you Raph,”

Raphael’s eyes lifted. “Why?” he asked again. “Why would you care about me?”

Simon’s heart sank. Did Raphael truly think so little of himself?

“The last time we saw each other…” Raphael murmured. “We didn’t exactly part on good terms Simon…”

“That was my fault,” Simon answered. “What I did…I don’t blame you for reacting the way you did…”

Raphael struggled to sit up, and Simon rushed to help, helping him sit back against the pillows, though the effort exhausted him. He huffed in annoyance at his own weakness.

“Take it easy, give it some time.” Simon said gently. “You’re badly hurt,”

Raphael sighed. “ _Pequeño...”_

Simon smiled softly, taking the endearment as a good sign. “It’s okay, I’m going to take care of you,”

“You don’t have to –”

“I’m _going_ to take care of Raphael.” Simon interrupted. “Let me help you like you always help me.”

Raphael pressed his lips together, and looked down again.

“Simon I ordered them to kill you,” he murmured.

“And I don’t blame you,” Simon said.

Raphael’s eyes flickered up. “You should blame me.”

“Well you were pretty angry –”

“I wouldn’t have let them kill you Simon I _swear_ , I would have stopped them I –”

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s _okay_ ,” Simon placed his hands on Raphael’s shoulders, as the vampire was beginning to look panicked. “Raph you’re acting so strange, you’re scaring me.”

Raphael let out a minute sigh. “I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay.” Simon said again, this time moving his hands from Raphael’s shoulders to each side of his face, cradling it gently as he forced him to look at him. “I _forgive_ you. I forgive you.”

Raphael let out a breath. “I missed you,” he whispered.

“I missed you too. Every day,” Simon murmured. “Longest two weeks of my life,”

Simon didn’t know who leaned in first, but then they were kissing, and Simon sighed contently as Raphael’s fingers curled through his hair. They kissed slowly, languidly, neither one of them wanting to hurry through the moment. They had kissed before, this was far from the first time. Simon remembered their first kiss had been accidental, he’d practically fell into Raphael’s lap once as he lost his balance and ended up gripping Raphael’s shirt as the other vampire struggled to hold him upright, their faces so close that when Raphael’s grip slackened their lips had touched. Simon hadn’t known who was more shocked, or indeed what was more shocking; the fact that they accidentally kissed, or the fact that they kept kissing after the initial accident. Either way, Simon hadn’t been complaining. But they never really talked about, whatever it was between them. Raphael wasn’t big on talking, he insisted on acting like nothing had changed, even if Simon secretly knew that Raphael did sweet things for him when he thought he wouldn’t notice. Simon suspected Raphael was a closet romantic, but he’d never call him out on it in case he stopped.

When Simon had been forced to make the decision to go behind Raphael’s back to help Clary, the look of betrayal on the vampire’s face broke his heart. After the order to kill him was made clear, he knew for sure he’d never be welcome again, and Raphael would never forgive him. It made missing him all the more painful. And yet here they were.

“What are we Raphael?” Simon murmured as he pulled away.

“I don’t know,” Raphael sighed. “I really don’t know.”

Simon nodded slowly. “You hate me for what I did,”

Raphael shook his head. “I’ve had time to think about it, and I understand why you did what you did. I’m not…angry Simon I’m…hurt. I’ll admit that.”

Simon lowered his eyes, his hands moving to grip his jeans tensely. “I’m so sorry,”

“I know.”

“I wish I could make up for it, if there was a way you could trust me again. I never wanted this to happen. And tonight I was just so scared you were going to die and I…I couldn’t bear that Raph, I couldn’t.” Simon was on the verge of tears when Raphael shushed him.

“Ssh _mi cielo_ , let’s not talk about this now,” he murmured, pressing his lips almost tenderly to Simon’s forehead. “For now, I’m just glad you’re here.”

Simon sighed, and took the chance to hug Raphael, cuddling close to his body. To his surprise the other vampire not only let him, but wrapped his arms around him, holding him closer.

“Come home Simon,” Raphael whispered, sounding almost desperately. “You belong here with me, not alone in the Institute,”

“You’d let me stay? After everything I’ve done?” Simon looked up uncertainly.

“You want to make up for your mistakes yes?”

Simon nodded.

“Then you can stay.” There was a faint hint of a smile on Raphael’s face. “It’s boring without your constant chatter around here, and I miss your music.”

Simon smiled. But then he noticed Raphael’s arms were shaking. In fact his whole body was trembling. Simon tilted his head to one side, frowning, before realisation dawned upon him.

“You need blood,” he realised. “Of course, I’m so stupid, you’re exhausted and hurt you need blood right now.”

“I’m fine,” Raphael denied.

“Liar.” Simon accused, and went to get off the bed, but then he paused, and looked back at Raphael sheepishly. “And I don’t know the combination to the blood storage. Never mind, plan B.”

Raphael raised an eyebrow at Simon, then quickly the other raised as well as he worked out what Simon was doing, watching the younger boy move his collar and offer him his neck.

“Simon I – I can’t take your –”

“It’ll work right? You need blood Raph, and I know you won’t tell me the code for the safe so take mine.” Simon cut off.

“But Simon –”

“It’s alright, I’m offering so you’re not stealing it or anything.” Simon grinned.

There was an innocence in his eyes that Raphael envied and adored, and he sighed slightly as he shook his head.

“You obviously don’t understand what it means for vampires to offer their blood to another.” He said.

“You can educate me about it later, for now I just want you to drink so you stop shaking. Please Raphael you’re worrying me.”

Raphael sighed. The last thing he wanted to do was have that worried look on Simon’s face last any longer, so he relented, and gently tugged the other over to him, sinking his fangs into his neck. Simon gasped, expecting pain, remembering Camille’s bite, but no pain came. Instead of pain, there was pleasure. A pleasure so intense Simon had to bite his lip to force back a moan. He certainly wasn’t expecting that. Pain would have probably been better. Simon balled his hands into fists, his breathing becoming erratic. Had it only been seconds since Raphael had bit him? Time seemed to stand still. He let out the breath he was holding as Raphael finished drinking, but he gasped again when his tongue darted out to heal the bite mark.

Simon caught Raphael’s eye when he pulled back. His eyes were almost black, and Simon just knew his own eyes looked the same. He practically lunched forward to kiss him, feeling triumphant hearing Raphael gasp against his lips. Simon pushed back against the pillows, hands covering his, kissing him hungrily. From Raphael’s smirk against his mouth, Simon figured his reaction had been somewhat expected. Maybe he should have asked what Raphael meant before. But rational thought went out the window as he kissed him roughly, not wanting to stop. But being a young vampire, Simon still hadn’t learned to control his fangs, especially when excited, and soon Raphael was pulling away with a pained hiss.

“Raph?” Simon panicked, covering his mouth with his hands. “I’m so sorry, are you okay? Did I hurt you? I’m so sorry, I’m sorry,”

“Hush _mi cielo_ , it’s alright.” Raphael took his hands and removed them from his face. “You just surprised me. You’re adorable,”

Raphael kissed his nose, and rested his forehead against his. “Still, we’re going to have to teach you to control that,”

“Yeah,” Simon said shakily. “Is this what you meant before, about not understanding what it meant for vampires to offer blood?”

“It’s not done often,” Raphael replied. “Usually in extreme circumstances, when someone is starving or in need of fast healing. It’s very rarely done outside of those situations, but when it is…”

“Yes?” Simon prompted.

Raphael smirked slightly. “It’s done between lovers. It creates an intimate connection between the two. I’m sure that’s something you discovered just now no?”

Simon felt his cheeks grow hot.

“Vampires don’t offer their blood freely like that unless it’s for someone they truly care for,” Raphael went on.

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing it was you then,” Simon said, trying to get over his initial embarrassment.

Raphael looked surprised for a moment, it was an adorable expression on Raphael. But then he shook his head, a faint smile on his face.

“I should warn you that you’re Marked now,” he said.

“Marked?” Simon questioned.

“Vampire fangs are as unique to us as fingerprints are to humans. That Mark will fade, but it will never disappear completely, and it will take time to fade. Vampires mark those that they claim as their own. Some mark their fledglings, some mark their life partners. You have mine on your neck, and others will recognise it. I suggest you hide it if you want no one to see,”

“I wouldn’t mind,” Simon murmured, taking in what Raphael said.

Raphael blinked, looking stunned.

“I mean it’s yours right?” Simon shrugged. “I don’t mind if people see. Unless you do,”

“I wouldn’t be…opposed to it. But they might get the wrong impression. You’re not mine Simon,” Raphael said slowly.

“Aren’t I?” Simon grinned. “How much more yours can I get?”

Raphael’s lips twitched upwards slightly. “You’d want to be mine?”

“I already am Raph,” Simon said softly, though his eyes darted down in embarrassment to such a cheesy statement.

Raphael chuckled, and lifted Simon’s chin upwards, leaning down to kiss him.

“Then you’re mine,” he murmured. “And I am yours.”

Simon answered by kissing him again. Raphael chuckled against his lips, and reluctantly pulled away. His ear twitched slightly, and he looked to the blacked out window, his brow furrowing.

“What is it Raph?” Simon asked, following his gaze.

“I don’t know…” Raphael murmured. “Something feels…wrong. Something’s not right.”

He looked back at Simon. “Simon something is very wrong. I can feel it.”

Simon glanced to the window again, worrying silently. He wondered what it was Raphael sensed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you want to find out what's happened to Magnus? you'll have to wait until the next chapter~


	5. Chapter 5

“What did you do to him?” Alec demanded as he stalked forward, not even caring if Valentine was more powerful than him.

The man in question just grinned at him. Alec grabbed him and shoved him roughly against the wall, and he didn’t resist.

“ _WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?”_

That’s when Valentine started laughing. The laugh was sickening, it boiled Alec’s blood with rage.

“Me? Nothing.” Valentine said. “My men just happened to dip their blades in mage bane tonight.”

“Mage bane…?” Clary whispered, looking horrified.

“The best way to disable a warlock’s magic,” Valentine supplied. “The poison is of my own creation, though I don’t like to brag.”

He smirked up at Alec, seemingly unabashed with being held against a wall by his throat.

“The warlock should be choking on his own blood by now. Or at least he will be when my boys are finished with him.”

Alec let Valentine go, shocked and shaking and horrified and what he’d heard. He stepped back from him, eyes wide and mouth agape. He shook his head, not wanting to believe what Valentine was saying.

“No…”

“It had to be done Alexander, the Downworlders are poison in your veins,” Valentine said.

Alec glared. “My name is Alec!” he snapped, pulling out his seraph blade. “The only one who gets to call me that is Magnus you son of a bitch and _I will kill you_!”

But Alec didn’t need to. In the midst of another bout of laughter from Valentine, Jace moved forward like a blur, getting to him before Alec could move. Valentine’s mocking laughter cut off with a shriek of pain, and he looked down to see Jace’s seraph blade embedded in his side.

“Johnathon…you…”

“You broke your end of the deal.” Jace said simply. “You said you wouldn’t hurt them. Now you’re dead.”

Valentine smirked. “If only it were that simple,”

The Valentine standing before them disappeared as though he were never there, leaving Jace’s seraph blade to fall to the ground.

“An illusion.” Izzy muttered. “Where could he really be hiding?”

But Alec was listening. He didn’t care about Valentine anymore. He’d got what he’d came for, and in so doing he lost Magnus. He shouldn’t have left him to run after Jace. That was all he could think about. He hadn’t hesitated when Jace had called, even when Magnus tried to warn him. This was his fault.

“Magnus,” Alec tightened his grip on his seraph blade. “I have to find Magnus.”

 “He’s right, forget Valentine. Magnus is more important,” Jace said.

“Then let’s go, double back where we came, we’ll find him Alec I promise,” Izzy turned on heel and ran back down the hall, the others not far behind.

Alec easily overtook her and ran down the stairs, finding the place where he’d last seen Magnus. There was Circle members littered over the floor, but no warlock.

“Is that a trail…of blood?” Clary swallowed, pointing to bloody droplets leading away from the main battle.

“It’s our best lead, let’s use it.” Alec said, and started forward.

The others followed close behind, weapons at the ready. It seemed Magnus had not been taken down without a fight, as many more Circle members were laying fallen along the trail. Soon the bodies filtered out, and what was left was the blood. Alec prayed it didn’t belong to Magnus. The path led them down, and down still, below the cellar in which they’d entered, deeper into the ground even more, before coming out down a hallway littered with small rooms. It reminded Alec of an asylum. And at the end of the hallway, the Circle was waiting for them.

Alec grit his teeth. “Fight me, I just dare you.” he snarled.

And the battle began.

Normally, Alec didn’t fight hand-to-hand. Oh he could do it, but it wasn’t his strong point. Fighting from a distance, disabling enemies with his arrows and protecting the line of defence were what he was best at. He very rarely used his blades and fists, that was Jace’s specialty not his. But tonight that didn’t matter. Nothing mattered more to him than getting to Magnus. Tonight he fought like a demon. He didn’t feel pain. He didn’t feel fear. He didn’t feel mercy. Jace was taken aback by the ferocity in which Alec fought, there was once a time where he couldn’t even beat him in hand-to-hand combat, and now he was taking down Circle members in twos. The rage that Alec felt went beyond simple combat. He stopped seeing them as people and instead saw them as targets. Later, he would feel ashamed for what his anger turned him into, but right now in this moment, he didn’t care.

When the last of the Circle had been defeated, Alec and the others started forward, into the chamber they had been guarding. Clary screamed at the sight. It was definitely designed to be a torture chamber. And there, lying still on a bloody table, was Magnus. Izzy gasped at Magnus’ bloody form, and Alec couldn’t even make a sound as he ran forward and tugged off Magnus’ shackles to untie him from the table. As he went to pick him up off the table the warlock gasped in pain, his shallow breathing becoming frantic.

“It’s okay Magnus it’s just me, it’s just me you’re alright,” Alec soothed as he picked him up.

Magnus was broken in many places, and he couldn’t stop from crying out in pain as Alec lifted him from the table and set him down gently on the floor, cradling him in his arms. Alec’s heart broke as he wiped his mattered hair from his bloodied face. Magnus eyes opened slightly, though it was clear the effort was exhausting him.

“Alexander…” he whispered.

“Ssh don’t talk, don’t waste your strength.” Alec shushed. “It’s going to be okay Magnus, you’re going to be alright.”

“I’m sorry…” a faint, sad smile appeared on Magnus’ face. “I’ve made you worry…”

“Stop that, it’s fine.” Alec said.

Magnus started choking, coughing up blood as Alec lifted his head to help him breathe. He let out ragged breaths, and his eyes were fluttering from open to closed. He was going limp in Alec’s arms. He was losing him.

“No no no Magnus come on stay with me, don’t you dare don’t you even think about it,” Alec panicked.

Magnus dragged his eyes opened again. “Jace…is he…?”

“He’s fine, he’s with us. We got him away,” Alec replied.

Magnus sighed. “Good…”

“Now we just have to get you back,” Alec held him tighter. “I left you there, and this is my fault, so I have to fix it, I have to make it right.”

“Alec…it’s not –”

“I’m going to save you,” Alec whispered, a few strayed tears finally running down his face. “I’m going to save you Magnus,”

“You already did,” Magnus breathed. “It’s too soon to tell you, but I love you.”

“People only say that when they’re about to die, and you’re not going to die Magnus. I told you didn’t I? I told you before this wasn’t going to be the last thing you did,”  

“Well…I just love proving you wrong…” Magnus half-smirked. He started choking again, letting out a pained whine as Alec held him. “Alexander…”

“No, no Magnus _please_. You can’t leave me, not now! I _need_ you!” Alec cried heartbrokenly. “I was just starting to fall in love with you, that’s not fair.”

“I’m sorry,” Magnus whispered.

“No…Magnus, you have to stay with me.”

With painful movement, Magnus reached up and touched Alec’s cheek. Alec leaned down to press his lips against his. Magnus sighed when Alec pulled away, eyes fluttering closed. With a final whisper of _I love you_ , Magnus’s breathing slowed, then slower still, then stopped.

“ _NOOOOOOOO!”_

 

 

 

_Next chapter sneak preview…_

_“Alec we have to go,” Izzy said, her voice low and muted._

_“I’m not leaving him here in this place Iz,” Alec said firmly._

_“I’ve got him Alec,” Jace said, bending down to help Alec carry Magnus._

_But Alec shook his head. “I’ve got him.” He said dully. “You cover me,”_

_Jace nodded. “Alright girls, let’s find Luke and get out of here.”_

_…_

_“Alec…are you…I’m sorry that’s a stupid question I…” Clary trailed off, staring down at Magnus laying on the couch, as though asleep._

_“I’m…going to stay. Here.” Alec eventually said, he hadn’t moved from his position next to Magnus since they’d gotten back to his loft._

_“Big brother…” Izzy came forward and knelt down to hug Alec._

_As much as he appreciated it, he needed to be alone. He hugged Izzy back, but Jace kept his distance, knowing Alec didn’t want to be touched right now. Alec nodded at Izzy as she got up._

_“You guys go…I need to be here,” he said._

_“Alright Alec,” Jace said heavily. “If you need us, we’re not far away.”_

_Clary argued with Jace in hushed whispers, saying she didn’t want to leave him like this, but Jace knew Alec best, he knew he needed to be alone. Izzy and Clary eventually relented, and they left Alec, sitting mutely beside Magnus on the floor, staring into nothing. As worried as his siblings were, they knew he needed a moment to himself._

_…_

_“He’s not dead you know,”_

_Alec whirled around, frozen in place as a man walked out of a billow of black smoke in the middle of the living room. The man smiled. He had the same eyes as Magnus, right down to the colour and feline pupils. Alec felt afraid for some reason._

_“Well, he_ is _dead. But that’s not always permanent,” the man continued._

_“Who are you?” Alec demanded._

_“I’m called many things,” the man said elusively. “In Hell, and on Earth,”_

_“You’re a demon.” Alec realised._

_“I am,” the man gave a wolfish grin. “But I’m a demon that can help you.”_

_“Why would you do that?” Alec narrowed his eyes. “I demand to know who you are,”_

_“My name is Asmodeus.” The man replied. “And I see you’re very attached to my son.”_

_Alec’s eyes widened. Son? His gaze turned to Magnus._

_“I can bring him back, I have that power.” Asmodeus went on._

_Alec looked back up. “You can?”_

_“I can indeed. For a price,” the demon smirked. “What would you be willing to pay Shadowhunter?”_

_…_

_TBC_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see look how good I am to you, I even gave you a sneak peek for the next chapter so you don't get too scared, aren't I wonderful to you?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to make you wait longer, but I was too excited to update

“Alec,” Izzy rested her hand on Alec’s shoulder. “Alec we have to go,”

“I can’t leave him here Iz. Not here,” Alec murmured, staring down at Magnus with unseeing eyes.

“I’ve got him Alec,” Jace said bending down to take Magnus from Alec.

But Alec shook his head. “I’ve got him,” he said. “You cover me,”

Jace nodded. “Alright, let’s get him home then.”

Alec tucked Magnus securely in his arms and stood up. Jace turned to the girls.

“Let’s find Luke and get out of here,” he said.

Back to back, brandishing their weapons, the groups made a circle around Alec, and made their way back down the hall and up the flights of stairs to the surface. They met with no resistance. Had this been a trap purely for Magnus? Alec began to wonder. Valentine talked about getting rid of the Downworlder’s influence on himself and Izzy. Meliorn would be safe in the Seelie kingdom, and Simon was safely hidden in the Hotel, but Magnus had willingly followed him to his death. He said he would do anything to help him find Jace, even if it was the last thing he did. Alec bit back tears. He’d gotten Magnus killed. The powerful and ancient High Warlock was dead because Alec ran off and left him facing an army of Shadowhunters, when all he could think about was his parabati. The worst thing was he knew Magnus wouldn’t even blame him.   

He felt Jace’s hand on his shoulder as they walked, but he didn’t look over to him. He kept his eyes forward, though he wasn’t really seeing anything. He didn’t remember meeting Luke, but he did remember his eyes as they looked at him, carrying Magnus’ broken body. He remembered the haunted look on his face as he and his pack escorted them back to the city. He remembered Simon running towards them like a blur, narrowly avoiding the sun that was beginning to creep over the horizon, to investigate what Raphael said was a ‘disturbance’. He doesn’t remember what Clary told him, but he remembered the look on his face when he saw Magnus, and he remembers the way he hugged her before running back to report to Raphael, like a comforting brother. He still doesn’t remember how they ended up at Magnus’ loft, but he does remember setting Magnus down on the couch, and staring down at him, wishing this was all a bad dream.

“Alec…” Clary’s hand came to rest on his arm, but he didn’t move.

Then Izzy was there, with her arms around him. Then she was gone replaced with Jace. Jace presence triggered something in him, and he responded. He hugged Jace tightly, and even though he tried he couldn’t stop himself from crying.

“This is my fault Alec, I’m so sorry.” Jace murmured.

“How is your fault? You did nothing Jace, I’m the one who left him. I ran off after you without a single thought for Magnus.” Alec’s voice broke on Magnus’ name, and Jace winced.

“You came to save me, all of you, and Magnus got killed because you needed to save me. If I had of been stronger I could have stopped Valentine last time and I would have never had to leave.” Jace looked down at Magnus’ body. “I’m as good as a murderer, like Valentine wanted.”

“Don’t you dare think that,” Alec hissed. “You are my _brother_. I just got you back don’t you dare start thinking that again. _I’m not losing anyone else do you hear me?”_

The others flinched at his volume.

“I’m not losing you to Valentine’s poisonous words Jace. You are a Lightwood, you’re one of us and you’ll always be one of us. Monsters don’t worry about being evil Jace, if you were like Valentine you wouldn’t be saying this.”

Jace didn’t believe him, but he nodded all the same.

“We should…” Izzy pressed her lips together. “We should get back to the Institute. Mom will be…worried,”

“She’ll probably be ecstatic when she hears what happened,” Alec muttered viciously, the thought of his mother making him angry.

He knew that she wouldn’t outwardly be pleased about Magnus’ death, but inside she would be happy to be rid of the warlock so she could continue to manipulate Alec’s life. She wouldn’t care at all that he was dead. Wouldn’t give the effort to care that the man her son was beginning to love, the man he cared for and adored, was gone because of him.  Alec would kill Valentine. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. But one day, he would run his blade through that monster’s neck. Vengeance may not be the answer, but it was _an_ answer.

“You go. I don’t want to see her right now.” Alec said.

“Alec…are you…I’m sorry that’s a stupid question…” Clary trailed off, looking at Magnus laying on the couch, as though asleep.

“I’m going to stay here. I need…I need to stay here.”

“Take your time Alec, come home when you need to.” Jace said.

With a final hug, Izzy left her brother, and the others followed with sympathetic glances over their shoulders. When the door closed, Alec sat on the floor next to Magnus, and cried. He hadn’t cried since he was very young, and he’d never cried harder in his life. He cried until he couldn’t breathe, choking on his sobs and gasping for air, gripping Magnus’ cold hand like a lifeline. He cried for hours, until his eyes swelled and his throat cracked. He cried until he couldn’t cry anymore, when the tears dried up and he was beyond sadness, when he just sat there numbly, staring at the wall, making o sound, not moving a muscle. He fell into an exhausted sleep.

When he woke, he prayed to any god that existed that it was just a bad dream. That Magnus would snap his fingers in front of his face and tell him to wake up, asking him what he was dreaming about, then laughing at the answer, because how could he die? Of all people? But it wasn’t a dream. Magnus was still lying motionless on the couch, and Alec was still slumped on the floor.

Not knowing what else to do, he decided to clean the dried blood off Magnus’s skin. He didn’t want to look at it any longer, and he didn’t want Magnus to lie in his own blood anymore. He deserved better than that. So carefully, with soapy water and a cloth, he washed away the blood from Magnus’ face, and neck, and hands. The clothes were still bloody in places, but it made Alec feel a little better.

“You know,” he said casually, as if Magnus were listening. “You’d probably scold me for leaving your clothes like this. That’s going to stain you’d say, you’d want me to change them immediately and soak them.”

As though Magnus himself had ordered it, that’s precisely what Alec did. He changed Magnus into what he’d been wearing that night to bed, and went about cleaning the blood off his clothes. He couldn’t fathom why, but he just knew Magnus would be irritated with his clothes being ruined, and so Alec wanted to fix it. As if he could fix everything. As if getting rid of the evidence made what happened fake, as if it fixed everything.

Alec didn’t know how many hours he spent wandering through Magnus’ loft, finding several old photo albums and pouring through them in the living room. Some were old portraits, and some were sepia photos, then black and white, then finally colour as the years changed. He saw photos of Magnus in various places in the world, some he’d never seen or heard of before. Most of the time he was accompanied by Ragnor Fell or a blue-skinned woman (Catarina Loss, from the inscription on the back of the photo). He recognised Raphael in some photos, and Camille in others. Some people he’d never seen before, and some bore the runes of Shadowhunters, which peaked Alec’s curiousity the most. His heart sank, knowing he’d never get the chance to ask Magnus about his past adventures.

There were letters strewn in between the photos sometimes, what looked like love letters from Magnus’ past. Alec didn’t read them, but he did read the letters signed by Ragnor. He smiled as he read through them, most of the letters were Ragnor scolding Magnus for whatever crazy and vaguely illegal thing he’d been caught up in Peru. It was mostly always Peru. He wondered if that’s where Magnus grew up. He wondered why he lived in New York now. He wondered on who this Imasu was, what Ragnor meant by ‘the guano incident’, and was alarmed at how much Magnus seemed to drink, judging by Ragnor comments on him  wanting to be left in the desert to become a cactus. There was so much about Magnus that he didn’t know or understand, and now he never would.

Eventually, Alec ended up just standing by the window, staring outside as he watched the sun dip below the horizon. He’d been there all day, and honestly he wasn’t planning on going home anytime soon. He wasn’t sure what he’d do next but he didn’t want to go back. He needed to contact Magnus’ friends, Catarina being one, to tell them what had happened. He wasn’t sure how warlocks were buried, but he should be taken care of properly, sent off with love, not cold indifference like the Shadowhunters would do.

 _“_ He’s not dead you know,” 

Alec whirled around, frozen in place as a man walked out of a billow of black smoke in the middle of the living room. The man smiled. He had the same eyes as Magnus, right down to the colour and feline pupils. Alec felt afraid for some reason.

 “Well, he is dead. But that’s not always permanent,” the man continued.

 “Who are you?” Alec demanded.  

 “I’m called many things,” the man said elusively. “In Hell, and on Earth,”

 “You’re a demon.” Alec realised.

 “I am,” the man gave a wolfish grin. “But I’m a demon that can help you.”

 “Why would you do that?” Alec narrowed his eyes.

 The man chuckled darkly. “I have my reasons.”

 “Who are you? Answer me.” Alec demanded again.

 “My name is Asmodeus.” The man replied. “And I see you’re very attached to my son.”

 Alec’s eyes widened. Son? His gaze turned to Magnus.

 “Your son?”

 “I’ve many warlock children, though few are left,” Asmodeus grinned. “Magnus has always been the one that has made me the most proud, such a powerful talent. I see you went and got him killed,”

 Alec’s eyes lowered.

 “But no matter, death is a trivial thing for a Prince of Hell.”

 Alec gaped. Magnus was son to a Prince of Hell? But demons lied all the time. Demons couldn’t love like humans, he wouldn’t be here because he loved Magnus, or even cared about him. What did he want?

 “I can bring him back, I have that power.” Asmodeus went on.

 Alec looked back up. “You can?”

 “I can indeed. For a price,” the demon smirked. “What would you be willing to pay Shadowhunter?”

 Alec froze. Then he steeled himself, and answered without hesitation.

 “Anything.” He said.

 Asmodeus blinked, then cackled. “Anything? You might want to reconsider that,”

 “I mean it.” Alec said. “I’ll give you anything you want, if you can bring Magnus back.”

 The demon prince chuckled, stalking slow circles around Alec.

 “Very well. What can I ask you for? Hmm, your parabati’s head on a plate? As delicious as that would be, I have no time for it. Your weapons? Useless to me. The Mortal Cup? Though the strife that would cause would be fun to watch, I think not.” Asmodeus stood before Alec, and nodded.

 “I have my price.”

 “Name it.” Alec said, trying to sound more confident than he actually was.

 This man looked like Magnus, but he was nothing like him. His energy was cold and dark, and his smile was menacing, eyes empty of emotion.

 “Your Angelic Power.” Asmodeus said.

 Alec blinked. “My…my power?”

 “Yes. Your Angels’ blood, the blood that gives you the power you wield, the power of a Shadowhunter.”

Alec lifted his arm, looking at his Angelic Power rune. He frowned. What would that do to him? Would it kill him? Would it make him mundane? His Angel blood was what made him him, what would happen if that was taken away?

 “Why would you want that?” Alec asked.

 “The gift of a Nephilim’s power is so rarely given,” Asmodeus said simply. “Nephilim have power in their blood that few ever unlock, the potential is under the surface of course, but most Shadowhunters never reach their full potential. You’re a Lightwood, such a powerful line, and for one so young, you have the power in your veins that I would very much like to have.”

 “And you promise to bring Magnus back if I give it to you?”

 “A deal’s a deal, that’s how it works. Demon magic is bound by contracts you know, if I make a deal I have to stick to it. I will bring Magnus back if you hand over your Angelic Power,”

 “And what…what’s going to happen to me?” Alec asked.

 “The answer to that is but a mystery, no Nephilim has had their energy drained and their Angelic Power taken from them before. You may survive, you may not. I cannot predict which. Do you still wish to make the deal Shadowhunter?”

 “I…” Alec looked at Magnus’ body, and took a deep breath. “Yes. We have a deal. Take my power, and give me back Magnus.”

 “Excellent, pleasure doing business with you Alec Lightwood,” Asmodeus smirked.

 He reached over, taking his arm and placing his hand over Alec’s Angelic Power rune.

 “This may sting, just a bit.” The demon chuckled.

 In the next moment, Alec had never felt such pain. He screamed and fell to his knees as the demon prince worked his spell. There was a dizzying sickness that sent waves of nausea over him, forcing him to close his eyes lest he be sick. The pain in his arm throbbed, and he felt his strength slipping away, his head swimming and throat dry. He didn’t stay conscious for long.

When Alec came to, his head was groggy. He groaned, pushing himself upright onto his hands and knees, and stayed still, trying to get his bearings. Soon, the world stopped spinning around him, and the need to be sick left him. He glanced at his arm – the rune of Angelic Power was gone, replaced by a strange rune Alec had never seen before. He touched it gently, running his fingers down the strange design. It felt different to most runes, more permanent, more powerful. He wondered what it could be. But he couldn’t focus on that right now. He looked up, but found Asmodeus was nowhere to be seen. Then it must have been done, his power was gone, and the demon prince with it. Alec swallowed. Had it been worth it?

He can’t have been unconscious for more than a minute, because at that moment he heard coughing, and jolted when he realised the body on the couch was moving. 

“Magnus!” Alec shot up, ignoring the head spin and rushing to the warlock’s side, helping him sit so he could breathe. “Magnus?” 

Magnus opened his eyes, and blinked in confusion. 

“Alec…” he whispered, hand reaching out to touch his face. “Alexander…”

“I’m here Magnus, I’m here.” Alec smiled, leaning over to press his lips to Magnus’ forehead. “Everything’s going to be okay. I promise.” 

The warlock was exhausted, and slumped in Alec’s arms, eyes fluttering closed, breathing evenly. It was the most beautiful sound Alec had ever heard. But as he held Magnus, he couldn’t help but wonder what was different about him. Clearly he’d survived the spell, but what had happened to him? Would Magnus notice? Would Asmodeus be back? What exactly had he done to get Magnus back?

There are always consequences, magic always had a price. Alec just hoped his price hadn’t been too much to pay.  

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah thank you lovelies for waiting for this chapter! I've been busy with studying and exams and ugh everything.

“Alexander, please stop hovering. You’re making me nervous.” Magnus sighed, sipping his tea with a sour look on his face.

He didn’t particularly like tea, but it was doing its job in reviving his energy. This particular brand of boiled leafy hell happened to be Ragnor’s favourite, Earl Grey or some such nonsense. Ragnor always said it was good for the soul. Magnus snorted. He didn’t have a soul to be good to. And Alec, who had been in fact hovering nervously around Magnus, sat down at Magnus’ instruction, watching him carefully.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “I’m just worried.”

Magnus sighed and put his teacup down, shifting under the blanket Alec had put over him. He reached for Alec’s hands, and Alec moved forward to take them.

“Darling, I know I’ve worried you. And I know you want to take care of me, and believe me I very much appreciate that. It’s honestly the sweetest thing and I adore you for it, but I’m alright now. I promise you I am perfectly fine, I’m just a little tired.” He said.

Alec let out a breath, and nodded, looking down at their joined hands. Magnus squeezed his hands momentarily.

“You saved my life,” he smiled softly. “I don’t know how, but you saved my life. You’ve done enough now, you’re allowed to take a break, you don’t have to wait on me hand and foot I’ll be fine,”

“I’m just terrified I’m dreaming, and if I leave you for a second you’ll disappear,” Alec murmured.

Magnus reached up to pull Alec’s face down to his and kiss him. Kissing Magnus served as a reminder that he was very much alive again, and Alec wasted no time in responding, though his enthusiasm ended up with him practically on Magnus’ lap, which the warlock found amusing.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” Magnus said. “Now _please_ get some rest. I promise I won’t go far, I’ll stay right here.”

Alec was reluctant, but relented at the pleading look in Magnus’ eyes. Magnus sent him to bed, and with a click of his fingers, sleep came almost instantly. Once he was asleep, Magnus frowned slightly. Something was wrong. He could feel it in the air. Magic not his own had been in this house, and from the cold aura it brought, Magnus couldn’t shake the feeling something was very, very wrong. Alec was acting strange, though that could be from worry, and Magnus himself felt fine. But he’d been alive long enough to trust his instincts, and they were telling him something was off.

The sun was gone from the sky now, and in the dark Magnus received an unlikely visitor. Raphael didn’t both knocking, he hadn’t knocked for years, and Magnus didn’t seem all that surprised to see him stride into his loft.

“Alec’s asleep, don’t wake him.” Was all the warlock said.

Raphael came to stand at the window beside Magnus, looking him up and down with a frown.

“You smell different,” he said.

Magnus raised an eyebrow. “I do?”

Raphael frowned. “Maybe it’s not you…but this place…smells cold. Like its evil.”

“So you feel it too,” Magnus murmured.

“Something’s wrong, I could feel it at the Hotel. I came to check on you, can’t be too careful with the Circle running amok. Downworlders need to look out for each other,”

“You can’t just admit you care about me? Not even once?” Magnus smirked. “Raphael we’ve been friends for a long time,”

“I wouldn’t use that word per say,” Raphael shrugged.

Magnus sighed, shaking his head. “You’re just like Ragnor. You’re both so cruel to me,”

“Only when it’s funny,” Raphael smirked. “And maybe I do care, just a little. Ragnor is gone, maybe I don’t want to lose you too,”

Magnus glanced at him. “I know how important he was to you,”

“He was far more important to you Magnus. But it’s not about that. We _both_ lost Ragnor, and as you say, we’ve known each a long time. I don’t want any of my other old friends dying. I thought you were in danger, but you seem to be fine.”

“I was in danger, but Alec saved me.” Magnus said, gesturing back to his closed bedroom door. “Although I’m starting to think that wasn’t all him.”

“What do you mean?”

“This energy in here, it’s…familiar,” Magnus narrowed his eyes. “Foreign, but like a memory I’ve forgotten, I know its meaning is in there somewhere. I _was_ dead Raphael, I don’t know how I know that for sure, but I _was_ dead. My magic has had trouble coming back to me, it never does that no matter how exhausted I get. Explain to me how my magic leaves the world, but I’m still here?”

“You think the Shadowhunter did something?”

“I would never jump to conclusions. To suspect something of Alexander without any word from him would be unfair, but I do believe _something_ has happened, something that shouldn’t have.” Magnus gnawed on his bottom lip. “I don’t like this Raphael,”

“I don’t either.” Raphael sighed. “Why is it you and I always seem to get dragged into Shadowhunter drama?”

Magnus chuckled humourlessly. “Because we never learn? Is that a Mark on your neck?”

Raphael was quick to cover his neck, but Magnus had already seen it. He laughed quietly.

“Don’t tell me, the nerd kid right? Sheldon or whatever his name is,”

“Simon,” Raphael corrected stiffly. “And it’s not your business,”

“No?” there was an amused glint in Magnus’ eyes.

Raphael rolled his eyes. “Look does it matter? I think we have bigger concerns right now. You never change do you?”

“Nope.” Magnus smirked, popping the ‘p’ with his lips as he grinned. “Still, an interesting choice. Can’t say I understand your taste in men,”

“As if I understand yours any better,” Raphael retorted.

“I have stylish taste my dear, you’ve always been the weird one. I mean who prefers Ragnor over me?”

“Literally everyone,” the vampire teased.  

Magnus huffed.

They stood in silence for a moment, both looking out on the city. It was a rather comfortable silence, one they hadn’t had for a while. Magnus had never been as close to Raphael as Ragnor had been (especially back in the 60s) but he’d always remained a friend. He was happy that the surly vampire had actually found a willing partner, might make him less irritable.

“Your injures have healed quite nicely I see. That wouldn’t be Simon’s blood doing miracles by any chance would it?” Magnus said teasingly.

“Not. Your. Business.” Raphael repeated.

Magnus laughed. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Raphael’s phone rang at that moment, and Magnus almost laughed when he saw Simon’s name flash across the screen as Raphael took it out of his pocket.

“Simon, I’m gone for five minutes and you’re calling me?” Raphael said gruffly, answering the phone.

Magnus had known Raphael for a long time however, and he noticed how his voice softened when speaking to Simon, even if he tone was annoyed.

“ _Mi cielo_ you need to stop worrying,” Raphael sighed. “Yes, yes I’ll be home soon. Yes I know the Circle is out there still. Yes I know, _yes_ Simon I know that… _idiota_ you think I can’t take care of myself? Aiyah alright fine, _fine_ I’m coming back. Okay? Happy? Honestly the things I do for you. I _am_ centuries old you know. Yes yes I know I know, just calm down for five minutes and I’ll be back by the time you stop chattering. I’ll see you soon,”

“Worried boyfriend calling?” Magnus smirked.

Raphael didn’t bother denying it, just rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“He worries too much,” he murmured. “Been worrying since I woke up,”

“Alexander’s like that,” Magnus sighed. “What a pair we’ve picked.”

Raphael chuckled at that.

“I can portal you back to the Hotel. Don’t want to keep your heaven waiting do we?”

Raphael glared at Magnus. It was easier to say that to Simon, who didn’t speak Spanish. But Magnus, who knew almost every language on Earth, was going to tease him about this for centuries to come. In the end he let Magnus portal him back to the Hotel, and the vampire was immediately pulled into Simon’s arms. Raphael couldn’t even bring himself to be annoyed, just kissed Simon’s forehead and assured him he was fine, before distracting him with Star Wars on the TV so he’d stop worrying.

For Magnus’ part, he spent the better part of the night in his study surrounded by old tomes, researching into the night to find anything that would bring someone back from the dead, with seemingly no consequences, that even a Shadowhunter could do. He found nothing, and was forced to admit the strange energy was in his head. He must have been tired and paranoid, Raphael too, after all they were both not at 100% at the moment, it had to be a misunderstanding. Wanting to believe his darling Alexander didn’t bring a force of that evil to his house, Magnus reluctantly went to bed, curling up beside said Shadowhunter, and sighing contently as Alec automatically wrapped his arms around him, making him feel safe and warm as he slept. He’d get to the bottom of this tomorrow.

 

Alec woke rather late, or later than usual anyway. Magnus wasn’t next to him when he woke up, and as he made his way down the hall to the bathroom he could hear Magnus talking over the phone. Satisfied last night hadn’t been a dream, he stepped into the bathroom. Seeing two sets of towels set up he smiled, and picked up a little note from Magnus saying he was welcome to shower if he wanted to, he had clients to attend to this morning. He took the note’s advice, and hopped into the shower.

He realised with a curse that he didn’t actually have spare clothes with him. However when he got out of the shower, he saw another note that hadn’t been there before, informing him Magnus had put another set of his clothes in his room. Magnus had done that on purpose he was sure. Well, two could play at that game, right? Alec just had to overcome that nervous sinking feeling he had in his stomach, and get to the room without having to confront Magnus. And besides, Magnus had already seen half-dressed before, what was the big deal? The big deal, his brain reminded him, was that they were alone and in his loft, and Alec was essentially naked with the exception of a towel. Not that he thought Magnus would do anything, he knew the warlock enough by now to know he’d never force him into anything, this was just a big of harmless teasing on his part, and surely Alec could calm down and play along. He could always turn Magnus’ plan around on himself, and be the one to tease the warlock. Alec actually grinned at that idea. Sounded like fun. Steeling his confidence – he was a Shadowhunter after all, one little warlock who meant no harm shouldn’t make him feel so nervous – he wrapped the towel around his waist, having deliberately not dried his torso properly, and stepped out of the bathroom and walked down the hall.

It brought him immense and smug satisfaction to see Magnus almost drop the phone when he saw him from the living room. His eyes were glued to him and Alec, for his part, found himself enjoying the attention. There would have been a time when it made him squirm in nerves, but the desperately wanting look on Magnus’ face made him feel, for once, desired. After a lifetime of trailing behind in Jace’s shadow, watching everyone and their mother fall in love with him, it felt nice to have such a powerful individual like Magnus look at him like that. He felt himself smirking, and Magnus caught the look with a knowing smirk of his own.

“Agnes dear could you hold for a minute?” he said into the phone.

“You, my dear Shadowhunter, are co cruel,” Magnus purred as he put down his phone and stalked over to Alec. “Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”

“I have some idea,” Alec smirked, enjoying his little game. “Like what you see Magnus?”

“You know I do Alexander,” Magnus grinned. “But I must ask where this delicious confidence came from? Not that I’m complaining, I am in fact, quite proud of you. But I have to admit I didn’t expect it,”

“Believe me, I’m doing a good job at keeping it together right now,” Alec said. “I’m nervous as hell.”

“It’s just me Alec,” Magnus smiled. “I don’t bite unless asked,”

Alec chuckled. “But that’s the problem. It’s you. I can’t think straight when I’m with you,”

Magnus raised an eyebrow at his choice of words. “I should hope not,” he said. “I would have thought you can’t think straight in general,”

“You know what I mean Magnus stop teasing me,” Alec rolled his eyes fondly.

“ _I’m_ teasing _you_? Do you see what you’re doing right now? You’re killing me darling you can’t expect me to keep my hands to myself for much longer with you walking about like that,” Magnus said gesturing to Alec’s exposed torso. “You’ve no idea how badly I want to touch you right now,”

“But you won’t,” Alec said.

“Not without your permission, no.” Magnus agreed. “Never without your permission.”

“And that’s why I know I can do this around you,” Alec smiled, suddenly getting shy. “I know you won’t do anything I don’t want.”

“Oh you are cruel,” Magnus smirked. “Testing my resolve are we? I have self-control, but not much. So if you want to keep me off you, I suggest you do go and get dressed now, though I enjoyed the show.”

Alec knew Magnus was joking. He knew he’d never touch him if he didn’t want him to, even if he badly wanted to.

“Who said I wanted to keep you off me?” Alec said innocently, growing confidence again.

He liked this, he really did. It was something he’d always wanted to do with a guy, tease him like this, like it came naturally, like there was nothing to be hidden away or ashamed of. And there wasn’t with Magnus. He could be who he was without fear.

Magnus practically growled, his eyes darkening. “You sure you want to continue that train of thought Alexander?” he murmured

Alec chuckled breathlessly. “Just let me kiss you then I’m done,” he said leaning down.

Magnus practically attacked his lips, and Alec pulled him flush against him in response. He felt a shiver run down his spine as Magnus moaned into his mouth. He felt Magnus’ fingers run over his torso, making him hold Magnus tighter, his breath hitching in his throat. The kiss didn’t last long enough for Magnus, it would never be enough. But Alec’s shy (and yet smug at the same time, how did he do that?) smile when he pulled away, the warlock flushed and out of breath, made it almost worthwhile getting teased to oblivion like that. Almost.

Magnus grinned. “I have to say, you do know how to make a warlock’s head spin. The things you do to me Alexander honestly,”

Alec chuckled as Magnus trundled away to return to his phone call. Alec went into the bedroom to change, coming out into the living to watch Magnus handle his client. Deciding to be bold, he approached Magnus and hugged him from behind, the warlock smiling and leaning back into his chest as he spoke to his client on the phone. Alec rocked them gently back and forth as Magnus spoke, one of his hands resting on Alec’s around his waist. Right now, everything was okay. Right now, it was perfect and worries could be thought of later. Suspicions still lingered at the back of Magnus’ mind, and worry still hovered in Alec’s thoughts, but for now, nothing mattered but the two of them. Alec wished they could stay like this forever.

Always be careful of what you wish for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry nothing too exciting happens in this chapter, but I wanted to write a little fluff and give everyone a little break from the angst. Don't worry angst is coming next chapter, be prepared.


	8. Chapter 8

Alec stared at his arm, examining the rune he’d never seen before. He’d gone through books of runes, and hadn’t been able to find the marking anywhere. He was burning with curiosity, he wanted to know what the rune was, and why it was there. Taking out his stele, he tried to redraw his Angelic Power rune to no avail, it wouldn’t take to his skin anymore. He suddenly panicked. Was his power gone? Was he no longer a Shadowhunter? Without his runes he was practically mundane. Blindly he drew a healing rune on his forearm, and sighed when he felt it burn into his skin. So his stele still worked, he could still draw runes. But not the Angelic Power rune. That concerned him. What had Asmodeus done to him? Did he even have angel blood anymore?

“Alec darling where’s your Angelic Power rune gone?”

Alec startled when Magnus suddenly appeared behind him, staring down at his arm with a frown. Alec twisted in his chair to look up at him.

“Magnus! I thought you were with a client,” he said.

“I was, but I finished my work early. Now answer my question, where’s your rune gone?”

Alec raised an eyebrow. Could Magnus not see the new rune? That was probably a good thing, but how was he going to explain his rune’s absence?

“It’s just faded, I’ll redraw it soon,” he said quickly.

Magnus frowned harder. “I thought Angelic Power runes were permanent?”

“Semi-permanent,” Alec lied. “It’s nothing to worry about.”

“…Alright.” Magnus stepped back and moved to his drinks cabinet, pouring himself a martini. “Care for a drink?”

“No I’m fine,” Alec muttered. “I’m gonna go get my gear together. I’ll probably be needed at the Institute soon,”

“Naturally.” Magnus nodded. “Don’t be a stranger now Alec,”

“Course not Magnus,” he gave Magnus a tight smile that the warlock noticed, if his raised eyebrow was anything to go by.

When Alec went into the bedroom Magnus frowned, sipping his drink thoughtfully. The boy was hiding something, that much was obvious. Magnus was certain it was to do with that rune disappearing and him being alive. Alec couldn’t lie to save his life, all he had to do was ask. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know, but he needed to.

There was a knocking on the door, presumably from one of Alec’s siblings as any of Magnus’ friends let themselves in. Putting down his drink he went to answer it.

“Alec I – oh! Magnus!”

It was Izzy at the door, and she turned white as she saw Magnus.

“Isabelle? Are you alright my dear?” he asked her.

“I – I just…” Izzy’s eyes travelled to a spot behind Magnus, to see Alec coming out into the hallway, giving her a tense look that said ‘don’t say anything’. She forced a smile. “I’m just…surprised you’re up and about so quickly Magnus. You were hurt pretty bad, we were all so worried.”

“I’m quite alright,” Magnus said. "Did you need something Isabelle?"

Izzy gave an easy laugh. “I was just checking in is all, see how you were both doing. Alec, I need to talk to you when you come home. It’s very urgent.”

“I’ll be home soon Izzy,” Alec said reluctantly.

“Good.” Izzy had a sweet smile on her face that made Magnus slightly afraid. It hid anger, that smile, and Magnus did not want Alec being on the receiving end of it. “I better get going, I just wanted to stop by for a moment,”

“You sure you need to go right now?” Magnus asked.

“Yes, I’m a little late in fact, I’m meeting Clary downtown for a patrol. I’ll see you at home brother. Good to see you’re okay Magnus,”

“Bye Iz,” Alec said as Magnus closed the door. That was odd.

Magnus waited until he couldn’t hear Izzy’s footsteps anymore before turning around, glaring at Alec’s retreating figure.

“Alexander Lightwood get the hell back here!” he snapped.

Alec froze, and reluctantly turned back to face Magnus. The angry warlock stalked slowly towards him.

“What did you do?” he demanded.

“What do you –?”

“Don’t take me for a fool Alec I know something isn’t right!” Magnus cut off. “Isabelle looked like she’d seen a ghost when she saw me. Your rune is missing and my house is filled with evil magic – explain that!

“Magnus I didn’t –”

“Don’t lie to me.” Magnus said. “If you care about me at all, don’t you dare lie to me.”

Alec sighed. He looked pleadingly at Magnus, like he was begging him to understand what he was about to say. Magnus folded his arms over his chest, and waited.

“I made a deal with a demon to bring you back,” Alec muttered.

“You made a _what_ with a _what_?!” Magnus shrieked. “You dealt with a _demon,_ are you _insane_?!”

Alec winced. “It was the only way to bring you back,”

“So I did die.” Magnus realised. “I died that night.”

Alec nodded, unable to look Magnus in the eye. “I couldn’t…I couldn’t just leave you…”

“And what did you sell for my life Alec?” Magnus looked terrified at the very idea. “What did you _sacrifice_ for me? What kind of demon has the power to bring back the dead anyway?”

“I…I didn’t go looking for the demon I…he appeared, here in the loft. He offered me a deal and…”

“And?” Magnus pressed. “His name Alec, his price. Tell me!”

“He was your father Magnus,” Alec said tensely.

Magnus took a few dazed steps backwards.

“My father?” he whispered.

He couldn’t breathe. He knew his father. He was cruel and heartless man. He wouldn’t offer to bring him back out of the goodness of his heart. What did he take from Alec? What did he want?

“Magnus it’s okay, it’s okay I promise! I’m still here and I’m fine, nothing bad has happened to me, or to you.” Alec said starting forward, but stopped when Magnus looked up with a sharp glare.

“My father always wants something.” He hissed. “What did he take from you? What did you promise him?”

“He took my Angelic Power. In exchange for bringing you back.” Alec replied quietly.

Magnus’ eyes widened. “Your rune…”

“It won’t draw back on, my stele won’t work. I can draw other runes but not that one. I…I don’t know what that means…” Alec stammered.

“No…” Magnus whispered, rushing passed Alec and sprinting to his study.

Alec was close behind him, watching him flip anxiously through the pages of a tome. He stopped at one page in particular, and looked up at Alec.

“Show me your arm,” he commanded.

Alec couldn’t refuse, Magnus looked full of nervous energy, like he was about to explode. It frightened Alec. Magnus took his arm and looked it over in his hand, frowning when he saw nothing. He muttered a spell, and suddenly the rune became visible to him. His eyes widened, and his jaw dropped.

“What is it? What is that rune?” Alec asked.

Magnus’ eyes slid up to Alec, and he pressed his lips together in a tight line.

“It’s in one of the language of Hell. You won’t find it in normal tomes, but in a warlock’s spell book…it’s dark magic Alec. Dark, terrible magic. Permanent and binding.” Magnus dragged the tome over to Alec, and he stared down at the page, seeing the rune on his arm.

Under the drawing of the rune, was written the words ‘Soulless’.

“Soulless…?” Alec whispered.

“Demons don’t have souls.” Magnus said. “Which means neither do Downworlders with demon blood mixed in our veins. If you believe in that sort of thing anyway. But essentially, warlocks don’t have souls. Only creatures with angelic blood have them. Father took that blood away from you, and now…now you’re like us. You have no soul.”

“What…does that mean?” Alec turned to Magnus, afraid and panicking.

“You’re not a Shadowhunter. But you’re not a Downworlder either.” Magnus took a deep breath. “Having no souls is what makes a creature live forever…you’re immortal Alec. You’ll never die. You’re going to live forever.”

Alec pulled back like he’d been stung. Live forever…he was going to live forever…

“I didn’t know…” he said in the face of Magnus’ angry expression. “Magnus I didn’t know…”

Alec felt fear seize his heart, felt it pounding in his ears as panic overtook him. He was immortal! An immortal Shadowhunter…what had he done? He became aware that Magnus was rushing about his study, gathering things and setting them up on the desk.

“Magnus what are you doing?” Alec asked, sounding out of breath due to his panic.

“I’m summoning my father.” Magnus said determinedly. “I’m bringing him here and I’m making him let you out of this deal.”

“No! You’ll die Magnus!” Alec cried.

“I don’t care!” Magnus shouted. “I’m _supposed_ to be dead! There is a natural order, even for the immortal, what is dead should stay dead! You can’t pick and choose who lives, you can’t screw with the balance of the world! That is dark and dangerous magic! And you can bet my father has you on his leash now, and I won’t have you live with that wolf on your back.”

“He said he had no idea what the spell would do to me. He said he just wanted my power for himself. I gave it to him, he has no reason to come back.” Alec tried to soothe Magnus but it wasn’t working.

“He’s a Prince of Hell he lies!” Magnus scowled. “He’s a cruel man Alec, he takes he doesn’t give. Even if he didn’t know what would happen it won’t take long for him to realise you’re alive and come back for something else. How could you have been so stupid?”

“I didn’t want you to die Magnus!” Alec said defensively.

“So you think giving up your power was a good idea?” Magnus shrieked, looking panicked and angry. “Look what it’s done to you – look at the curse you’ve inflicted on yourself!”

“I thought I would die, not this.” Alec said.

“Like that makes it any better.” Magnus shook his head irritably. “It’s okay, you didn’t know what would happen. But I have to make this right. You don’t deserve this,”

“You’ll die.” Alec said firmly. “You can’t fix it.”

Magnus snorted in an undignified manner. “You really think so little of yourself you’re willing to remain like this, even _die_ , just so I can live?”

“Yes!” Alec snapped. “Stop acting like it’s the end of the world Magnus! Yes I didn’t know what would happen to me, yes I thought I would die instead, and yes I would give my life for yours! It’s not that I think little of myself, it’s that I think too much of you! People need you Magnus you’re the High Warlock of Brooklyn!”

“Your family needs you Alec! Don’t be stupid! How _dare_ you make that decision yourself! Who the hell are you to decide which one of us is more important?”

“I don’t care!” Alec almost screamed. “I admit it – I wasn’t thinking! I didn’t care! All I wanted was to have you back! I’d die for you any day of the week, I was willing to do it and I’m sorry but I did it anyway! Because I care about you too much to let you go now!”

Magnus's breath hitched in his throat.    

“Don’t act like you wouldn’t so the same in my place,” Alec murmured. “Wouldn’t you give yourself up so someone you love might live? I know you would if you could.”

“But you don’t love me,” Magnus said desperately.

“Maybe not yet,” Alec replied. “But I know I will. I wanted to have the chance to love you, I don’t want that taken away. Magnus I can’t bear the thought of you dead because of me, I’m sorry I did this I’m sorry it happened but it’s happened now and I can’t fix that.”

Magnus sighed. “Alright…it’s alright. You didn’t know. But _I_ can fix it. I have to make him let you go and give you back your angelic power. You can’t stay like this.”

“Why is it so bad for me to be like you?” Alec said hurtfully. “Magnus it was my decision to make that deal. I didn’t know it would make me immortal, but even if I did, I still would have agreed.”

Magnus froze, looking up at Alec like he didn’t know who he was. “What did you just say?”

“You heard me. If I had to go back in time, knowing what I know now, I would still make that deal. If it would bring you back, if it would give you back to me, I would make the same call all over again.”

“You –”

“What is the big deal about me being immortal anyway?” Alec challenged.

“What’s the big – _Alec_! You – argh! – I’ve had it with you!” Magnus’ magic flared up, and shattered several vials lying around the room as it lashed out violently in his rage.

Alec flinched back at the display of power, staring into Magnus’ angry feline eyes.

“You think this life is a game?” Magnus hissed. “You think it’s such an easy choice? You think nothing bad will happen from this? You’re naïve. You’re a child! You know nothing of the world and you think to lecture me about ‘your’ decision?!”

“Mag–”

“You have no idea the consequences of what you’ve done! And to know you would do this willingly – _knowingly_! – I just – ugh! – You complete and utter _selfish idiot_! You saved me for yourself, for your _own_ sake! I wish you hadn’t – I wish you’d left me to _rot_! That would have been better than _this_!”

“Magnus!” Alec couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

Magnus could be bitter when upset, but not this cruel. He never looked at Alec with such a cold look in his eye, such a scowl on his face.

“Enough!” Magnus shouted, the room growing dark, his power making the floorboards rumble. “I’ve had it with the conversation! I’m done with it! I’m done with this whole mess! I’m done with Nephilim! Get out of my house! _Now_!”

With a click of his fingers Alec was transported outside the loft, and the door locked securely behind him. Alec turned, staring with wide eyes, unable to believe what just happened. He’d never seen the warlock so angry before. Alec could understand to a degree, but surely, this wasn’t a bad thing? It was problematic yes, but now one of their biggest problems was solved. Alec was no longer mortal, he’d be able to be with Magnus forever, he wouldn’t cause the warlock any pain by dying if he could stay with him forever. Did Magnus not want that? It seemed like it. He was so angry with Alec’s immortality…did he only want Alec because he was mortal? To stick around for a few decades, then die so Magnus could find someone else? Did he not love him like he said he did? Wouldn’t he want him forever? Alec wanted Magnus forever. He’d never choose immortality under any other circumstances, but it was to save Magnus’ life, and he got to be with him for eternity on top of that, wasn’t that a good thing?

He didn’t love him. Or maybe he did, but he wouldn’t love him forever. That was all Alec could think of. Magnus only wanted him for a mortal lifespan. Of course he did, he was ancient and forever, and Alec was just his new fancy, something bright in his long life to occupy himself with for a few decades. He didn’t want to stay with Alec for as long as forever. Alec felt like crying. Or hitting something. Maybe both.

He didn’t want the lecture from Izzy, but he called her anyway, as he walked dejectedly back from Magnus’ loft. He told her everything, and surprisingly she listened and didn’t interrupt once. When he was finished, she surprised him again with her answer.

“Give him some time maybe,” Izzy murmured. “He might just need to take it all in. I mean you’re pretty shaken up about it too, he probably just needs time to come to terms with it. Like I do actually. This immortality business…I can tell you’re already upset so I won’t say anything now, not until you’re okay. Even if I want to yell at you for being so stupid, Magnus seems to have already done that enough.”

“He did that alright,” Alec muttered. “I don’t know what to do Iz. I mean, I don’t _want_ to be immortal, but if I try to go back on the deal Magnus will die, and if I’m going to be like this, shouldn’t I make the best of it? Like I always do? I’m trying to look on the bright side but…there doesn’t seem to be one right now.”  

“Oh big brother. Just come home, and we’ll talk. I won’t tell the others anything until you’re ready for them to know. We’ll deal with this problem all together, like family should. Come home so you can get rest and calm down, okay? I’m here for you Alec.”

“I know.” Alec sighed. “Thanks Izzy.”

He hung up, but instead of heading to the Institute, he turned around and made his way to Central Park. It was a long walk, but it would serve to clear his head. The sun was setting, but Alec wasn’t afraid. He had his gear with him and his weapons, since Magnus had deemed to rid himself of all his belongings when he’d ousted him from the loft. Wanting some time alone, Alec found a quiet bench and sat down, closing his eyes.

“What have I done?” he muttered to himself.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and the angst returns! I'm thinking of doing two or three more chapters of this. but don't worry it won't be the end! I have a list of stories to put into this universe


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here you are my lovelies, I worked super hard on this one to get all the emotions I wanted to cover down on paper so I hope you enjoy! It's super late now but do look forward to my next chapter, I'm thinking of maybe one more, or maybe I could delve back into my saphael arc, been a few chapters since we saw them together, what do you think?

“There you are,”

 

Alec dully lifted his head from his hand, looking up from the ground. He had no idea how long he’d been sitting here on this bench, but he realised that it was night now, and there was no around but him, and the approaching Magnus.

 

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” Magnus said in a rush when he reached Alec.

“Isabelle said you never came home, that you took off somewhere and I’ve had Jace screaming at me all afternoon, I’ve been so worried and I –“

 

Magnus broke off at Alec’s blank expression. He sighed. Clearly the Shadowhunter was in no frame of mind to listen to him, or even want to hear him. Quietly, he sat himself down next to Alec, looking at his hunched shoulders sadly.

 

“I’m sorry I shouted at you.” he murmured. “I shouldn’t have gotten so angry. It was inexcusable behaviour, I apologise.”

 

From anyone else, an apology that formal would have seemed insincere. But Magnus was from a different time, his words were a reflection of the ages he’d lived through. Alec vaguely wondered if his speech would one day reflect the time he’d been born in, when people speak so differently in the years to come.

“I understand.” Alec said mutely.

“I don’t think you do,” Magnus said. “You’re young Alec, you are unable to understand what it is to be immortal, nor would you understand fully my anger at you suggesting you choose such a life willingly.”

“Is it such a curse to you Magnus?” Alec slid his eyes in Magnus’ direction.

“At times,” Magnus sighed. “Alec, immortals do one of two things. They either deal with what it means to be mortal, or they go mad. I’ve seen some take their own lives rather than live like this, while others have thrived, and some stay the same, trapped in time, miserable and on the verge of sanity. There’s no way of telling which kind of immortal you will be, and I don’t want to see you lose your mind to this life,”

“It’s that bad?”

The fear in his eyes sent Magnus’ heart racing into overdrive.

“Not always.” He said. “I just…oh Alexander…you have no idea what you’ve signed up for…”

Alec looked at the ground again, and shrugged one shoulder. “I thought it would be worth it, in the end you know, since I’d get to stay with you forever I thought I could deal with whatever comes before that. But you wouldn’t want me forever, so I guess you’re right, I don’t want this. Not if you won’t want me one day,”

“What?” Magnus’ eyes widened. “Alexander what on earth made you think that? Of course I want to be with you forever don’t be ridiculous!”

Magnus moved off the bench and crouched down in front of Alec to force him to look at him.

“Alec I told you I loved you and I meant that. I fall in love very quickly once I’ve found the right person, and I don’t stop easily.”

Alec gave him a doubtful look.

“I’m serious. You remember Camille yes? She cheated on me so many times while we were together and I still loved her, I let her do anything she wanted if she just loved me back but she never did. If I can love someone who treated me like that for as long as I did, why wouldn’t I love you for eternity? Alexander…”

Magnus reached up and cupped Alec’s cheek in one hand.

“My darling Alexander,” he murmured. “I will love you until the end of time, this I promise you. Is that what you’re truly worried about? You have nothing to fear in that regard.”

“But you were so angry about me being immortal…you were happy when I was mortal I just…I just thought…” Alec was so very close to crying, and Magnus had to do anything to prevent the tears from spilling over.

“That’s not why I was angry,” he said. “I was angry because…because you don’t understand how hard this is going to be. You’re so very young, you haven’t lived the life I’ve lived, haven’t suffered the pain that I have. I know what you’re going to have to face and that kills me inside, because I know my love for you won’t change what will come, and I know there will be nothing I can to stop it. One day you’ll watch your sister die, you’ll watch Jace die, your parents, Max, Clary, Luke, everyone you love will grow old and die while you remain like this forever.”

Alec knew that. He hadn’t let himself think about it before, but he did know that. Just how many loved ones had Magnus watched die in his long life? How many loved ones’ deaths would Alec have to suffer through? He couldn’t imagine a life without his siblings. What would we do when his parabati died? Would he go mad then? Or would he hold on until his whole family was gone, would he then lose his sanity, and force Magnus to watch his descend into madness?

“I would spare you from that pain if I could.” Magnus went on softly. “I would give anything for you not to have to experience that. Because you’re never going to be ready for it, and it never gets any easier to bear.”

Alec closed his eyes and sighed.

“Please go home Alexander, be with your family. Tell them what’s happened and think about it, truly think about it. Come back to me when you’ve thought this through, and then decide if you want to live like this.”

“You’ll die if I say no…”

“I don’t mind. I’ve lived a long time. I’ve had a good life,” Magnus smiled sadly. “If it stops you from going through the pain and the hardship of immortality, I’m willing to die. I was already willing to die for you Alec, I don’t mind dying to give you a normal life.”

He stood up, and pressed his lips tenderly to Alec’s forehead.

“I want you to know I’m proud of you,” he murmured. “And I won’t resent you if you decide to get out of this deal. I just want you to be happy, and remain that way. Think about it.”

Magnus left Alec there, and he eventually wandered back to the Institute like Magnus suggested, after sitting alone in the dark for hours, thinking it over. Jace, of course, was infuriated with Alec’s predicament, while Izzy just clung to him like grim death, determined not to let him go.

Alec watched Jace rage and pace and rage some more, patiently waiting for his brother to be calm enough so he could speak. Clary was wringing her hands in concern, her big eyes wide and worried, but she said nothing as Jace jetted around the room like a fire cracker.

Alec sighed. “Jace?”

Jace kept on pacing.

“Jace? Could you…could you _stop_ for five seconds?”

Jace did stop, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling at Alec.

“Jace...look,”

“No _you_ look Alec. Our bond is _sick_ , it’s literally sick. I can barely feel you there anymore, it’s like you’re dead! It’s been making me ill for days since you did this – whatever deal with that demon! It’s like you’re a ghost now, our bond is only going to get weaker the longer you stay like this, you have to get Magnus to get that demon back and let you out of this deal!”

“Magnus will die if I go back on my word. Jace I can’t let that happen, I’m sorry but I can’t.” Alec said.

“Magnus means more to you than us? Than me?” Jace raised an eyebrow. “You don’t mind losing us if you have Magnus?”

“Jace! Don’t say that you know that’s not true!” Alec gasped. “You’re my brother! I didn’t do this on purpose but I can’t and I _won’t_ change it now!”  

“Don’t yell at each other!” Izzy cried. “Yelling won’t solve anything.”

Jace simmered in anger, Clary looking nervously between the two of them.

“I’m not the one who turned himself immortal for a warlock,” Jace muttered.

“Jace!” Clary snapped. “That’s not fair and you know it, this is Magnus we’re talking about!”

“Dammit Jace don’t judge me like you wouldn’t do the same thing for Clary!” Alec glared. “Yes, losing you and Izzy is going to kill me, yes I didn’t want to be this way, yes I am sorry this has happened but I am not going back on this deal! I will not regret my decision and you can’t make me feel bad about that!”

“Alec Magnus is –”

“The man I _love_!” Alec shouted.

The others went quiet, as did Alec himself. Could he say that confidently? Maybe he could. The utter fear and panic that pierced his gut when Magnus died was the worst feeling he’d ever experienced. The joy when he opened his eyes was unlike any feeling of relief he’d ever felt. The way Magnus made him feel, like he was loved, desired, _important_ , he didn’t want that to go away. Magnus was such a bright light in this dark world, Alec would do anything to keep that light lit. Magnus made him feel like no one did, like no one else could, and he knew in his heart he’d never want that to change. He’d always want Magnus. Was it possible to love someone so much after such a short time knowing them? Alec wasn’t sure. He’d never felt like this before. Was this what love was? This feeling? This feeling of not being able to be without Magnus, to not even be able to survive the thought of living without him? It was different to the way he depended on Jace, different to the way he needed his sister. Magnus was just…different. It had to be love.

The more Alec thought it, the more confident he became. He did love Magnus. This feeling couldn’t be anything else. He couldn’t see himself making this kind of sacrifice for anyone he wasn’t in love with. Not even Jace. He was in love with Magnus, and Magnus needed to know that.

“I know you don’t agree with what I’ve done. And to be honest, the idea of being immortal is terrifying me. I don’t want this, but I can’t let Magnus die. I love you Jace, you’re my parabati, and I hope that won’t ever change no matter what about me changes, I don’t want to lose you either. But Magnus…”

“Alright,” Jace murmured, coming over and laying a hand on Alec’s shoulder. “It’s alright, you don’t need to say anything else. We’ll find a way around this, we’ll deal with this together, as a family. Whether you’re immortal or not, we’re still parabati and I love you. if you’re sure you want to stay like this, if this is what you really want, then I’m here for you.”

“Thank you,” Alec let out a breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding.

Jace shrugged. “It’s my fault, what happened to Magnus. It should be me paying this price, not you.”

“Jace don’t be stupid, it wasn’t your –”

“If I hadn’t have gone with Valentine, you never would have been in that warehouse,” Jace cut in.

“If I hadn’t let Magnus come with me he wouldn’t have died,” Alec countered. “If I hadn’t have left him alone…it was my fault Jace, not yours. You don’t need that on your conscience.”

“And you do?” Jace asked rhetorically.

Alec just sighed. Izzy rested her hand on his arm comfortingly.

“Alec…you know this path will be difficult, right?” Clary said quietly.

“Yeah,” Alec answered. “You guys are going to age, and I’m not. And…honestly I don’t think I’ll ever be able to come to terms with that reality but…”

Alec shook his head, not really knowing what to say.

“Magnus will look after you,” Clary said hopefully.

“That’s if he ever stops being angry with me. He might just hate me for eternity. And, I’ll have to be stuck with Simon forever, not something I’m looking forward to, that vampire talks too much.”

Jace cracked a smile at that.

“Magnus will come around I’m sure, he told you it wasn’t about him not wanting you right? He’ll come to terms with it,” Izzy assured him.

“And if he doesn’t well then hey, guess I’ll have to pay him a visit,” Jace shrugged.

Clary smirked. “He’s a High Warlock Jace he’ll crush you,”

“He’s only one warlock I can handle him,” Jace brushed off.

Alec chuckled. “He took down five Circle members at once. Without touching them.”

“Okay that’s…more intimidating than I was expecting.” Jace admitted.

Alec laughed, shaking his head to sober his thoughts.

“I should go to Magnus…I need to tell him my decision. Wish me luck,”

“Don’t get killed.” Izzy smiled.

“If you hear screaming it’s me,” Alec grinned, and turned on heel to leave the Institute, avoiding his parents and making his way to Magnus’ loft.

The warlock was not going to be happy to see him once he told him he decision.

 

“Alexander,” Magnus sighed when he saw Alec at his door. “Come in, come in.”

The warlock looked unhappy, more tired than angry, it made Alec sad to see his beautiful face so upset. He followed Magnus into his living room, noticing the warlock avoided making eye contact with him, before turning around to face him, determinedly not looking him in the eye.

“Alright, break it to me gently won’t you? I’ve had a long day.” He sighed.

“I’m sorry Magnus,” Alec started, watching the warlock’s shoulder slump. “But I’m staying immortal.”

Magnus eyes shot up in disbelief. “Are you crazy? Have you actually lost your mind?! Alec –”

“Please don’t yell Magnus,” Alec winced. For some reason he just couldn’t handle Magnus yelling at him again.

At his expression Magnus composed himself, taking a deep breath before speaking.

“I’m sorry Alec, I won’t yell.” He said. “I’m thoroughly upset though.”

“I know you are, but please, let me explain first? Then you can yell.” Alec pleaded.

Magnus sighed and nodded, gesturing for Alec to continue as he paced around the room listening.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said, and Jace had some things to yell at me too. Our parabati bond is sick, with my immortality I’m practically dead to his senses. That kind of scares me.”

“Then why stay like this?” Magnus sounded calm, but Alec wasn’t reassured. He was far too calm. The calm before the storm. Alec prayed he didn’t trigger it with his words.

“I know that I’m going to one day lose everyone I care about. One day I’ll lose them, and that’s going to hurt. It’ll hurt more than I can imagine, and honestly I don’t know what’ll happen after that, if I’ll even be able to get over that. But you’ve been through that so many times, I can’t put you through that again. I won’t have you be in pain any more – the one thing I’ve been worrying about is my mortality, I was always going to die and leave you alone and in pain and now, I don’t have to do that.”

“Alec…”Magnus didn’t know what to say. No one had ever sacrificed so much for his happiness before, no one had ever cared for him so much. It was foreign to Magnus, and honestly frightening.

“What about Jace? You think you parabati bond is bad now, can you honestly imagine what it’ll be like for you to live through his death?” he said instead. “You think you’ve wrapped your head around your family’s death but believe me you will not ever be able to prepare for that. You’ll lose everything,”

“I’ll still have you. Right?” Alec looked uncertain. “You’ll help?”

“Of course darling,” Magnus murmured. “I’ll always be there. But am I enough? Will I be all you need when you’ve lost everything else? Somehow I doubt that.”

“If I have you to keep me centred Magnus, I believe I can suffer through it. I know you’re worried, and I know you don’t want me to go through what you’ve gone through. But I can’t lose you, and I don’t want you to lose me.”

“Why are you doing all this for me?” Magnus whispered desperately. “ _Why_ Alec?”

“Please don’t be mad,” Alec murmured, looking down.

“Oh my darling,” Magnus breathed, stepping over to Alec to tilt his chin back up to look him in the eye finally. “I’m not mad at you, I promise. I know it seems like it, but I lash out like that when I’m frightened. And right now I’m terrified.”

“Why?” Alec asked. “Why are you so afraid of this?”

“ _Because_.” Magnus said simply, eyes begging Alec to understand. “Forever is such a long time Alexander. I want to spend all of that time with you, but I’ve been down this road before. I know what it is to love and to lose and no one…I give my heart over completely to the people I love, I do anything for them and I love them so much but…no one ever stays… everyone _leaves_ me Alec. _Everyone_.”

There were tears in his eyes when he turned away, and Alec’s heart broke at hearing the warlock’s breath hitch.

“Having you as a mortal meant that I would always lose you to death. That was inevitable. Would I be devastated? Yes. Would I ever accept it? No. I’d never get over it and I’d never forget you but…I was comforted in the knowledge that I would have you before that, that I could love you and make you happy before I had to lose you. Now you’re like _me_. And now…”

Magnus turned his head back to Alec. The Shadowhunter had never seen Magnus look so scared.

“Now I’m going to lose you in an entirely different way. There will come a time when you love me, and that time will the happiest of my life, but then there will come a time when you don’t love me anymore. When you wake up and realise I was a mistake, and you made the worst decision of your life. And you will resent me for the choice that you’ve made, whether you want to or not. I don’t want you to leave me Alec, but you will. You will because everyone always does. The mortals die and the immortals get bored with me. I don’t want you to _leave_ …”

“Magnus…” Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus, unable to do anything else as the warlock started crying against him. He rand his hands gently down Magnus’ back, reassuring him in his presence. “Magnus I promise that won’t happen. I’m not going to leave you, not ever.”

“You can’t possibly know that. You can’t promise me that.” Magnus sobbed. “Warlocks are cursed Alec, we’re never allowed happy endings because we’re monsters.”

“Ssh don’t say that, you’re not a monsters Magnus.” Alec soothed. “Didn’t you say that even you can’t tell the future? You don’t know that’s what will happen.”

“That’s what always happens.”

“I’m not them Magnus. And maybe you’re right, maybe I can’t promise that won’t happen. But I’m going to anyway, and the only way I can make you believe me is prove it to you. So a hundred years from now, hell five hundred years from now, I’m going to turn to you and say I told you so,” 

Magnus gave a watery laugh. “Talk to me when it’s a thousand years, then I’ll believe you,”

“Deal,” Alec smiled.

“Alec please reconsider this madness,” Magnus whispered, even though he was clinging so tightly to Alec he was contradicting his words. “Please _I’m not worth this.”_

_I’m not worth this._

Oh.  

That broke Alec’s heart. He could almost feel it shattering.

“You’re worth everything and more,” Alec murmured. “I promise I won’t regret this decision, I won’t resent you for anything and I will never leave you alone. I love you Magnus, you’re worth it.”

“But you _don’t_ love me! You said it yourself, you don’t – and you think you can make the rational decision to be with me forever? Alec this isn’t a decision anyone can just _make_ , especially when they’re not even in love yet!” Magnus cried miserably, looking up at Alec with pleading eyes.

“Magnus, I might be young and not understand a lot of things yet, but if the way you make me feel isn’t love I don’t know what to tell you. If I can feel this strongly to someone I haven’t know that long, if I can make this sacrifice knowing it’s the right decision, if I know I won’t want to leave and if the thought of losing makes me panic this much, then I don’t want to know what love actually is.”

Alec pressed his lips to Magnus’ halting any protest he might have made.

“You make me lose my breath when you walk into the room,” Alec murmured against his lips. “My heart races when you walk by. My skin tingles when you’re close enough that I can feel your breath. My life was in black and white before I met you, I was miserable and I hated everything and everyone. And now it’s in colour, everything is brighter in the world now. I can smile, I can be happy, and I know who I am. I know what I want, and I know what I feel. I know that I can’t help feel this way about you, even though I’ve tried to pretend like I didn’t. I know that I would _die_ without you. I’ve lost you once already Magnus, and I know how it felt. I can’t lose you again. I’d do anything to stop that from happening.”

Alec pulled away, looking into Magnus’ eyes. “Now look me in the eye and tell me that isn’t what love is.”

Magnus’ eyes connected with his for a brief moment, before they shied away and he looked down, unable to tell Alec he was wrong. Because he knew he wasn’t. Magnus had heard all that before, he’d experienced all that before. He knew Alec knew what he was talking about.

“I wasn’t sure at first, but when I think about you dead and broken on the ground, I can’t…” Alec faltered, almost crying, but going on. “I made that deal willingly, and I would do it again. I’m sorry, but that’s how I feel. You can hate me and you can be angry, but how I feel won’t change. I want to be yours forever, if you’ll have me.”

“Of course I’ll have you.” Magnus whispered. “I just…I…”

“Don’t be afraid Magnus,” Alec murmured, kissing Magnus’ forehead. “I’m trying to reassure you but I don’t know how since I’m afraid too. I’m trying to make sure you know I’m not going to leave you.”

“You can’t know that.” Magnus muttered dejectedly.

“Magnus I swear on the Angel –”

“Alec don’t –!”

“I swear on the Angel, I will _never_ leave you.” Alec finished firmly.  

Magnus pressed his lips together. He wanted to be able to hate Alec. He knew what it was for a Shadowhunter to swear on the Angel. He knew how powerful that oath was, and just how important such an oath was to Alec.

“I just hope you don’t regret this day,” Magnus murmured, unable to argue anymore.

“I won’t. I promise.” Alec said.

Magnus glanced up at him, almost shyly. “You really love me?”

Alec slowly smiled. “Yes. I really do.”

Magnus’ unhappy expression finally lifted, and he smiled. It was a small smile, but it lit up his entire face. He was beautiful. In every way. And he was Alec’s. He was Alec’s for eternity.  


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just one more chapter left after this guys! I hope you've enjoyed the story so far!

Simon plucked at the strings, using his musician’s ear to tune the guitar to perfection. It had been quite a while since he’d picked up a guitar, and as he strummed experimentally on the strings, old memory came flooding back, guiding his fingers to play the well-known tune. He stopped strumming and began to pick at the strings, humming along to the melody as he plucked. Playing guitar gave him a sense of normalcy, back when he was just a regular guy with good friends and a girl he loved. His biggest problem was breaking the news to Clary that he was in love with her. Now everything was different, much more complicated. Now, his biggest problem was accidentally killing someone, or upsetting the fragile balance of the Accords. Again. But playing the guitar calmed him, it was soothing to the soul. He plucked at the guitar strings, tuning them as he played, but it wasn’t long before his playing attracted attention.

“I didn’t know you played,”

Raphael’s voice appeared at the door, and Simon glanced up at him before returning his attention to the guitar.

“Oh this isn’t playing, I’m just tuning it,” he replied. “I was in a band before all this happened,”

“Yeah? Were you any good?” Raphael smirked.

Simon chuckled. “We thought we were. We only had a few gigs, but people seemed to enjoy them. Things were simpler back then though, I didn’t have to worry about supernatural creatures trying to kill me.”

“Technically you did, you just weren’t aware there we existed,” Raphael shrugged.

“True.” Simon agreed. “Do you play anything?”

Raphael tilted his head to one side, thinking with a frown. “I remember…when I was alive, I played the violin. Mama loved the violin, so I wanted to learn to play it for her. I wasn’t very good as I recall, but she loved it when I played. It’s been such a long time now though, I don’t think I’d be able to play anymore. I play piano mostly.”

“Ah piano, so old-fashioned,” Simon grinned. “Women love it apparently,”

Raphael chuckled. “Not so much nowadays, they prefer guitarists now, so I hear.”  

“Wish someone told the girls I knew that,” Simon said. “I might have actually had a date,”

“You do,” Raphael grinned.

Simon smiled up at him. “Yeah, but I had to get killed and turned into a fanged nocturnal monster for that to happen,”

“It adds to your charm,” Raphael smirked.

“Oh I had charm to begin with? I seem to recall you constantly telling me to shut up,”

“You never stop talking, that’s true.” Raphael considered. But then he smiled. “It’s kind of cute.”

“So glad you think so,” Simon muttered sarcastically. “That’s just what I want, to be a cute vampire.”

Raphael chuckled. “There are worse things to be _mi cielo_ ,”

Simon smiled, and sighed happily as his fingers trailed over the guitar strings. He liked it when Raphael called him that. He’d started only a few days ago, but Simon was already addicted to it. He didn’t know what it meant, but the way Raphael said it made him shiver. Things were simpler before he was a vampire, his biggest problem was his unrequited love for Clary. But now he had Raphael, a boyfriend who loved him without him having to do anything. Raphael hadn’t said as much, he wasn’t very good at talking about feelings, he had other ways of letting Simon know he cared about him. The Mark that was still on his neck (and freshly applied almost every night thanks to Raphael), and the matching set of fang marks on Raphael’s defined their relationships as official. All in all, Simon couldn’t be happier at the moment.

Their relationship hadn’t changed much since that night, they still bickered and Raphael got annoyed with him at all times and Simon was still infuriatingly annoying and sarcastic, but now it was said in jest, usually with Raphael fighting to keep from smiling at Simon’s antics. It was a system they were comfortable with, though Raphael still made Simon nervous and jumpy, especially now he was allowed to be openly attracted to Raphael, unlike before when their relationship mostly consisted of occasional secret make-out sessions and the very rare sweet moment from Raphael, though he did all he could to hide it from Simon.

There was still the issue of accidentally killing someone or upsetting the Accords, but he was surprisingly happy in his new life.

“Raph?” he asked, looking up from the guitar.

“Yes Simon?” Raphael replied.

“You love me…right?”

Raphael froze, like a statue. He looked like a deer being caught in headlights, and Simon bit his bottom lip, suddenly regretting his question. He didn’t know why he wanted Raphael to say it, well, that was a lie, he knew exactly why he wanted Raphael to tell him he loved him. But he shouldn’t push, it had only been days since they defined their relationship, and barely a few months since they’d met. Raphael wasn’t the most touchy-feely person either, but Simon noticed that he was actually extremely sweet and romantic when he wanted to show it.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t – I mean it’s okay if you don’t – even if you do, you don’t have to say anything.” Simon stammered. “I mean it’s just that _I_ love you and I wanted to know if maybe you loved me too? Which it’s okay if you don’t that’s fine I just wanted you to know that _I_ love _you_ and you’re probably still mad at me because of what I did and that’s fine I kind of hate me for that too, and I just –“

“ _Simon_.” Raphael said suddenly, cutting off Simon’s speech mid-sentence. “Calm down, you’re working yourself into a panic attack _mi amor.”_

Simon looked down. “Sorry…”  

Raphael’s face softened, and he walked over to Simon, leaning down to kiss his forehead.

“ _Te amo mi cielo_ ,” he murmured. “It’s been such a long time since I felt any emotion, I’d forgotten what feeling felt like. But I love you very much, more than I thought I was capable of. Will you tell me what’s worrying you so _mi vida?”_

Simon shivered slightly. “That’s three.” He murmured.

“What?” Raphael raised an eyebrow.

“That’s three different things you’ve called me. What do they mean?”

Raphael smirked. “That’s for me to know, and for you to find out. But don’t distract me Simon, tell me what’s wrong.” At Simon’s reluctant expression Raphael pulled out his best puppy eyes. “Please Si?”

Simon couldn’t resist Raphael on a good day, especially not when he pleaded with those damn eyes of his.

“I just…sometimes think this is all a crazy dream,” Simon sighed. “It just all seems so impossible,”

“I felt like that when I was still a fledgling.” Raphael nodded.

“It’s not that. Like yeah, the whole vampire thing can get overwhelming sometimes, but I’ve more or less come to terms with that. My training is slow, but I have forever to figure it out. That’s what gets me…I have forever. Literally forever.” He glanced up at Raphael. “And I have you…forever?”

Raphael gave a small smile. “Of course you have me forever _mi cielo_ , if you want me.” he murmured.

“I do, but…” Simon glanced down again. “Will you want _me_ forever? I can barely believe you want me _now_.”

“Simon,” Raphael sighed. He sat down next to Simon, shaking his head. “You worry too much about the future _mi amor_ , when you’re immortal the future hardly matters. Live in the now, yes? Now is what matters,”

“I guess,” Simon murmured.

Raphael used two fingers to lift Simon’s chin up to look at him. “ _Te amo_ Simon,” he murmured. “ _Te. Amo_.”   

“What...?”

“It means I love you.” Raphael said softly. “And I do. I love you Simon,”

“I love you too,” Simon whispered.

Raphael smiled. “We have forever _mi amor_ , remember that and don’t get too caught up in what will be. No matter what comes, no matter what happens, I will be here through it all. You have me for eternity Simon, I chose you because I knew I would want to be with you for all that time. Why do you think I don’t date? I’m not Camille, I don’t play with people and I don’t choose people if I will only leave them in the end.”

“I know, I know. I guess I just…worry you’ll realise what an idiot I am and decide against this,” Simon said embarrassedly.

“ _Idiota_ , I already know you’re an idiot,” Raphael rolled his eyes. “It’s endearing. Everything about you is endearing to me. Annoying at first, but it’s your charm, you’re adorable.”

Simon grinned and shook his head. “I don’t want to be adorable to you,”

“Too bad,” Raphael smirked, leaning over to kiss his temple. Simon giggled.

“It’s not fair. You get to be sexy and attractive and cool, and I get stuck with being cute and adorable.” Simon practically pouted at Raphael as the other vampire laughed.

Simon liked it when Raphael laughed. His dark eyes lit up and his smile created the most adorable dimples in his cheeks.

“You think I’m sexy then huh?” he teased.

“Oh shut _up_ ,” Simon groaned. “You’re sexy and you know that,”

Raphael chuckled. “You obviously don’t remember last night then, because I seem to recall a perfectly sexy vampire in the shape of you crawling into bed with me,”

Simon smiled shyly. “You thought I was sexy?”

“Simon you’re killing me,” Raphael shook his head fondly. “Of course you are. Why is it so important to you anyway?”

“Because I want you to be attracted to me okay?” Simon muttered embarrassedly. “I don’t want to be cute, I want to be, I dunno… _alluring_? I want you to _want_ me,”

“I do Simon,” Raphael said, suddenly smirking. “Do I need to demonstrate that? Because I will.”

“No!” Simon squealed as Raphael lunged forward, moving his guitar out of the way to suck at his neck. “ _Raph_!”

Raphael chuckled, and relented, ruffling Simon’s hair as he pulled away. Simon half-glared at him, but it was more of a pout than anything.

“Now, stop worrying of the future and play something for me,” Raphael said gesturing at the guitar.

Simon immediately put his hands back on the guitar, blushing slightly.

“What should I play?” he asked, suddenly nervous.

“Anything _mi cielo_ ,” Raphael murmured.

Simon nervously began playing, strumming hesitantly at first, but gaining confidence as he lost himself to the melody. Raphael wasn’t familiar with the song he was playing, but it was beautiful. Raphael closed his eyes as he played, listening to the music. Simon was really very good. Raphael’s turned slightly sad when he thought of Simon playing in his band with his mundane friends. He must have been happy. He must have had a good life as a mundane, before he got dragged into all this chaos. Before Camille turned him into a vampire. As far as he knew, Simon had only gone to see his family once, and it hadn’t ended well as he desperately tried to hide what was happening to him. He didn’t think he’d seen them since. Raphael could relate to that, he hadn’t seen his own family for such a long time after he was turned.

“You play beautifully,” Raphael murmured, opening his eyes to watch Simon’s fingers fly over the strings.

“Thanks,” Simon said bashfully. “It’s better with the whole band together,”

“You must miss them,” Raphael said. “You haven’t seen them since you were turned have you?”

“Nah, too dangerous.” Simon said easily, though Raphael could tell it was difficult to think about. “As far as everyone else knows I just disappeared one day. My mom’s been panicking for a while, last time I was there I was a little crazy, and then I felt again and didn’t come back. I can’t see them again, not in this condition. They’ll give up looking for me soon, as far as they know Clary and her mom have vanished too. I’ll just be another missing person in New York in a year or so,”

“Doesn’t that upset you? For your friends and family to think you’re missing or dead? To have them panic and mourn like that?”

“What else am I supposed to do? I can’t go back to that life, not like this. I burst into flames in the sun, I drink blood, and I have super speed and strength and senses far beyond normal human capacities. I can’t very well tell them I’m a vampire that’s crazy, they’d lock me up.”

Simon sighed, plucking at the strings, humming quietly to the tune he was playing.

“ _Lo siento_ Simon,” Raphael said. “I’m sorry this has happened to you. If it’s any consolation, I wouldn’t have wanted this to happen.”

“Clay’s the one who made the decision, you just gave her the option. I’m a little mad still, but it’s okay Raph, I’ll get used to this life.” Simon smiled over at him. “Besides, I got you out of the deal didn’t I? I wouldn’t mind having your handsome face around for eternity,”

Raphael chuckled.

“I miss my mom and my sis,” Simon went on. “I miss the _sun_. I miss my old life, but this is who I am now. And now…hey, I might even be able to be someone here. I might be able to do some good here. Not that being a collage dropout with a crappy band wasn’t appealing, but maybe the whole nerd-turned-mystic-vampire thing will work out for me,”

“It’s done wonders for your physique already I can tell you that,” Raphael winked, watching in amusement as the boy spluttered, seemingly choking on air as he struggled to keep playing properly.

When Simon calmed down, Raphael put his hands over his to stop him playing, and leaned over the guitar to kiss him. The guitar itself was soon abandoned on the floor as Raphael pushed insistently against Simon, the younger vampire melting against him with a quiet moan.

Later, much later, Raphael was running his hands through a sleeping Simon’s hair, occasionally kissing the bite marks over his neck, speaking to none other than Magnus Bane over the phone. Raphael raised his eyebrows at the news of immortal Alec.

“Huh.” He said mutely. “Well I’ll be dammed. For a Shadowhunter, I guess he’s not so bad.”

“ _Not so bad_ he says,” Magnus mocked. “He’s perfect. I think…he’s The One Raphael, I can feel it…I just know it…you know what I mean?”

Simon choose at that moment to make a small mewling sound, unconsciously cuddling closer to Raphael. Raphael looked down at Simon, a smile coming to his face.

“I know exactly what you mean Magnus,” he murmured, fingers gently caressing Simon’s cheek. “Who knows, maybe we’ll both get happy endings this time,”

“True love never dies they say,” Magnus said, and Raphael could almost see the smile on his face. “And they’re not endings Raphael, they’re beginnings.”

A beginning. Yes, that’s just what it was. A happy beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spanish translations -
> 
> mi cielo = my heaven  
> mi amor - my love  
> mi vida - my life  
> te amo - I love you  
> lo siento - I'm sorry


	11. Moments in Time - Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end oh my gosh it's finally here! hope you lovelies all enjoyed the story, and don't worry I have many more moments of these immortal couples to share with you yet to come! all of these little snippets of moments will be turned into proper fics in the series, I'm just giving you a small taste of them now

Magnus could feel Alec’s eyes on him. Which wasn’t unusual, Alec often spent long hours watching him when they were alone in his loft. Well, he said often, they’d been dating for barely a month, but realistically, Alec _did_ often stare at him when they were alone – even when they weren’t – so technically it was true. This time, Alec was watching him paint his nails. He seemed to be quite fascinated by the process as far as Magnus could tell, or perhaps he was merely captivated by his beautiful face, which was very likely. Magnus smirked at his own train of thought.

“Darling, you’re staring at me again.” He said amusedly looking up at Alec.

The Shadowhunter blushed – he was so cute when he did that – and awkwardly shrugged his shoulders, struggling to look nonchalant about being caught staring.

“I like watching you do your makeup and nails and stuff,” Alec admitted, looking embarrassed.

Magnus smiled. “Hmmm and why’s that?” he asked as he kept painting his nails.

Today they were a dark blue. It was a midnight blue, Alec’s favourite colour incidentally. Magnus had asked him what colour he should paint his nails next, and the Shadowhunter had shrugged and casually suggested his favourite colour. Now, Magnus made sure to paint his nails midnight blue as often as he could. He was sure Alec noticed too.

“Because, you’re always so…graceful.” Alec sat down on the bar stool opposite Magnus at the bar table that separated the kitchen from the living room, and smiled easily, shrugging and waving about his hands in an attempt to explain what he meant.  

“It’s like you don’t even exist, you’re like…magic. That’s the only way I can describe it. Everything you do is flows easily, if I was doing that I’d be getting that polish everywhere but you’re so elegant all the time.”

Magnus smiled pleasantly, basking in Alec’s praised as he carefully ran the brush up and down his nails.

“Thank you darling,” he said with a wink. “That’s such a romantic way to describe me.”

“Is it?” Alec’s blush, which had died down until now, flared up again.

Magnus chuckled at the sight of it. When he was finished painting, his magicked his nails dry, and reached over to take Alec’s hands.

“What do you think? I’m thinking of adding a coat of silver glitter over the blue,” he said thoughtfully.

“Like the night sky,” Alec said.

Magnus smiled at the adorable child-like expression on Alec’s face. He nodded.

“Exactly. Like the night sky,”

“It’ll look good on you. Everything does,”

Magnus smirked. “Everything? Wait until you see photos of me from the 1800s, I looked ridiculous, fabulous back in the day of course, but ridiculous by today’s standards.”

Alec chuckled. “I doubt that Magnus. You always look amazing, in any era.”

“Your opinion might be slightly biased but thank you,” Magnus teased, reaching over to grab his silver nail polish. “Darling, if you’re so intrigued by my beauty routine, would you be so kind as to indulge me in something?”

“What?” Alec asked.

“Would you like me to paint your nails?” Magnus glanced up over his silver brush. “You’ve certainly watched me enough times for me to assume you’re somewhat interested in it. Or is just on me you find it fascinating?”

Alec thought about it. The idea was intriguing, but in all honesty Alec didn’t think he’d suit painted nails, and he told Magnus so.

“Nonsense darling, you’d look incredible. Provided it’s a dark colour, dark colours suit you, although I wouldn’t mind getting you in some lighter colours one day.” Magnus said.

“Good luck with that,” Alec teased.

“We have eternity my Alexander, I have forever to figure out how to bend you to my whims,” Magnus smirked. “You’re so easy already, I think I’ve got the expression down pat. All I have to do is give you that sad and adoring look and I’m sure you’ll say yes.”

“That so? Want to test it?” Alec grinned.

Magnus did love it when Alec got playful. It was a reoccurring phenomenon he was experiencing of late, and there was nothing Magnus loved more than watching Alec becoming more comfortable in his own skin, in the pace of their relationship, to watch him open up to him and let himself explore the feelings he’d denied himself for so long.

Watching Alec fall in love with him made Magnus fall even more in love with the Shadowhunter. He was certain in a few centuries time he’d still be finding more reasons to love Alec, whether Alec remained at his side or not. He said he would, but only time would tell.

Magnus in fact did test out his puppy dog face, and it worked like a dream. Soon, a smug warlock was painting Alec’s fingernails the same blue as his. Magnus chuckled.

“Never underestimate a warlock my love,” he said smugly.

“Yeah I’m starting to get that.” Alec huffed. “It actually doesn’t look all that bad,”

“You see? It’s charming.” Magnus beamed, looking down at their painted nails. “We match too, aren’t I cute?”

“The cutest warlock in the world,” Alec smiled.

Magnus giggled. “I love you Alec,” he said, smiling over adoringly at Alec.

“I love you too Magnus,” Alec replied softly.

 

…

 

“Raph, what are you doing?” Simon whined, tugging at his blindfold, wincing as Raphael slapped his hand away.

“Uh-uh-uh! No peaking Si, you’ll ruin the surprise.” Raphael scolded.

“Raph~” Simon whined louder, letting Raphael tug him down the hallway, trusting him to not lead him into a wall.

“No whining either,” Raphael said. “Just be patient.”

“Patience is for losers,” Simon muttered, earning him a smirk from his boyfriend, not that he could see it.

“Well since you’re already a loser, patience should come easy to you _idiota_ ,” he said casually.

Simon smacked him in the arm with alarming accuracy despite being temporarily blind. Raphael didn’t feel much damage as it wasn’t a legitimate punch, and so he just laughed at Simon while the other vampire rolled his eyes behind his blindfold. When they got to Simon’s – and Raphael’s now, since he technically hadn’t slept in his casket for over a month, preferring to stay in bed with Simon – room, Raphael pulled him into the room and shut the door.  

“Alright, you can take it off now.” Raphael said.

Simon was quick to remove the blindfold, blinking his eyes rapidly to get used to the sudden light. It was then that he saw it. Well, he couldn’t exactly miss it, since it was all over his room. Van Gogh’s Starry Night had been duplicated on his walls, and his ceiling, painted to make it feel as though he was inside the painting itself. The artistry was amazing, almost like Van Gogh’s brushwork himself. Simon gaped at the room, and Raphael reached for the wall to flick a switch. Little lights came on all over the room where the painted stars were, lighting the room in a soft yellow and white light. Simon had never seen anything so beautiful, and he glanced down in awe at Raphael, a questioning look on his face.

“You said you missed the sun,” Raphael explained. “I wanted to show you the night can be just as beautiful.”

“You did this…for me?” Simon’s throat went dry. “You painted this?”

“You’ve been upset lately, I thought this might cheer you up. Being a vampire is hard to get used to, and I didn’t have anyone to help me when I was turned. I didn’t want you to feel like you were dealing with it alone,” his explanation was simple, and not much emotion showed on Raphael’s face, but even his pretended indifference didn’t fool Simon into thinking he wasn’t nervous, waiting for Simon’s reaction.

Simon beamed and threw his arms around Raphael, sighing as the other vampire wrapped his arms tightly around his waist, holding him close and kissing his neck.

“Thank you,” he murmured. “This is amazing. I can’t believe you did this just for me,”

“Of course _mi cielo_ ,” Raphael said easily. “I’m your boyfriend it’s in my job description to take care of you when you’re upset.”

Hearing Raphael call himself his boyfriend made him giggle. He didn’t acknowledge their relationship in too many words (unless they were alone and the situation called for it) and hearing things like that always made Simon happy.

“We could go stargazing one light if you like, there’s a place in Central Park I like to go, on a hill where you can see the stars the best,” Raphael said as he let go of Simon.

Simon smiled softly. Raphael was incredibly romantic when he wanted to be.

“I’d love that. I’ll bring my guitar and serenade you by moonlight,”

Raphael laughed and shook his head as Simon began imitating doing just that. They spent the rest of that night just lying in bed together, Simon cuddled up in Raphael’s arms, staring up at the ceiling by the light of the ‘stars’. Simon smiled to himself. He had the best boyfriend in the world. He couldn’t wait to tell Clary they were together. With all the commotion lately he hadn’t had time to talk to her much, and he couldn’t wait to see her reaction when he told her about Raphael.

“ _Te amo_ Simon,” Raphael murmured.

Simon smiled softly. “ _También te amo_  Raphael,”

As lovely as Raphael’s gift was, the vampire alone was enough for him. Raphael was his sunshine. He didn’t need the real thing.

 

…

 

“Magnus how do you manage to buy so many clothes and yet never have anything to wear?” Alec was judging him from the other side of the room as Magnus practically climbed into his wardrobe, looking for a suitable outfit for their date.

“Oh hush Mister I Only Wear Black, it’s easy for you say you have nothing else in your closet,” Magnus said snappishly. “I look horrendous in green so that shirt’s out, ew why do I even _own_ those pants they’re _orange_. Ugh! I have nothing to wear this is disaster!”

Alec rolled his eyes at his overdramatic boyfriend.

“Magnus I’ve seen you naked, I don’t think anything you have over that delicious skin of yours could possibly turn me off,” he said, admiring the view silently as Magnus’ shirt rode up as he reached up for an outfit.

Magnus just huffed in response.

“You don’t have to impress me Mags,” Alec said softly. “You look incredible in everything and anything, it doesn’t matter what you wear. We’re only going to dinner.”

“Of course I have to impress you,” Magnus said. “I can’t have your standards be lowered by my lack of care for my appearance. I want every time you see me to take your breath away,”

“You always take my breath away,” Alec assured him. “Even in sweatpants with no makeup on,”

“Really?” Magnus peeked at him from behind a row of shirts in the closet.

Alec smiled. “Really.”

Magnus seemed to calm down at that statement, and ended up asking Alec to pick out an outfit for him. He picked his boyfriend out the outfit he’d worn when they first kissed at Alec’s wedding, over a year ago now. Magnus smirked at him as he came out dressed and ready, making sure to put pinkish red highlights in his hair again. Alec tugged on his lapels to kiss him, making Magnus giggled against his lips as he pulled him closer, the both of them lost in the memory of their first kiss. Even after a year, Alec never ceased to amaze Magnus. Maybe he’d never stop amazing him, just as Magnus would never stop taking Alec’s breath away.

In the end they ended up late for their dinner reservation, but they didn’t seem to mind.

 

 

…

 

Simon fumbled with the ring box in his pocket, nervously turning it over in his fingers as he waited for Raphael by their stargazing spot. He remembered the first they’d came here five years ago, Raphael had taught him all the constellations he knew, which was a lot Sion discovered, the vampire had studied astronomy among other subjects Simon could barely dream of. The interest in the stars – and oddly enough, of botany as well, such a cute quirk in his usually stoic boyfriend – was one of the many things that Simon loved about Raphael. His boyfriend was sweet and romantic, and Simon wasn’t very good at romance without stammering and chattering awkwardly, though Raphael assured him he found it endearing.

But tonight had to be perfect. Simon had been to Alec and Magnus’ wedding the year just gone, and had asked Alec’s advice in asking someone to marry you. Alec’s proposal story sounded like something Simon would do honestly, he’d stumbled over his words and made a mess of it, leaving it up to Magnus to interpret his meaning as he usually did when he fell to pieces. The warlock was quick to say yes once he’d worked out what Alec was asking, but would Raphael react the same way? He said he wanted to be with Simon forever, but that didn’t mean he’d want to get married.

Where did vampires even get married? They couldn’t walk on hallowed ground, and Raphael was Catholic, while Simon was Jewish. They had a lot of difference when it came to that, maybe marriage was different for vampires? Simon didn’t know how devout Raphael was, he knew he always worse his golden cross, but his mother had given him that so it could be more out of sentiment than anything else. Raphael had taught Simon how to wear a Star of David without it burning him, and he tugged at it nervously as he waited. Maybe this was a stupid idea, he started to regret inviting Raphael here but then suddenly the vampire was there and he had to say it now or he’d never say it.

It took Raphael a few tries to understand what Simon was rambling about, but once he’d figured it out he gasped, staring at Simon like he didn’t know him.

“You…you want to marry me?” he breathed.

“I…yeah…o-only if you want to too, I mean it’s up to you…” Simon stammered.

Raphael’s eyes softened. “But Simon…why would you want to marry _me_?”

Simon felt like he’d been slapped. What?

“Why wouldn’t I?” he asked. “You’re the sweetest boyfriend in the world and I love you, why wouldn’t I want to marry you Raph?”

“I could give you a list of why I’m hardly husband material. Your mother doesn’t like me for one,” Raphael said sarcastically.

It wasn’t entirely true. Simon had eventually gone back to see his family once Raphael had taught him how to control his vampirism. His family had had trouble accepting Simon’s undead nature when he’d first told them, but once they sort of got used to the idea, Simon brought up introducing his boyfriend to them. Raphael had been the perfect gentleman, of course his mother had liked him, she just put on a hard face so as to warn Raphael not to hurt her baby. Raphael insisted she still didn’t like him.

“Raph she loves you don’t be ridiculous,” Simon rolled his eyes. “And my sister’s jealous of me because she’s practically in love with you herself. That’s hardly a convincing reason why we shouldn’t get married.”

‘Well I tried,” Raphael sighed. “I just can’t believe you’d want to marry me,”

“I love you.” Simon said simply.

Raphael smiled slightly. “I love you too _mi vida_ ,”

“Then? Is that a yes?” Simon looked so eager it made Raphael laugh.

“Yes,” he answered, his eyes shining in the moonlight. “Yes Simon, I’ll marry you.”

 

 

…

 

“Alexander…”

“Sshh don’t distract me.”

“Alec –”

“I’m almost done.”

“Done what darling?”

“Aaaand there. Finished. Ta-da!” Alec moved out of the way so Magnus could see what he was working on.

It was a cake. A very pretty looking one too. Magnus had discovered Alec had a passion for baking about ten years into their relationship, and had encouraged his hobby. It was a very useful tool for helping Alec work through emotions. He’d needed it when Izzy and Clary died, and he’d baked for an entire week nonstop when Jace passed away. The parabati rune was faded on his side now, the Lightwood family crest burned into his skin just below it to keep his siblings with him in spirit. Magnus shook his head, refusing to think about such sad thoughts.  

“What’s this for then darling?” he asked.

“Our anniversary’s tomorrow Mags,” Alec smiled. “Simon and Raphael kind of invited themselves over tomorrow to ‘help us celebrate’, whatever that means. It came up on me a bit fast or I’d have planned something special for us.”

“Oh sweetheart, you don’t have to do that,” Magnus murmured adoringly.

They celebrated their anniversary differently every year. Two years ago Alec had taken them to Indonesia. He’d been worried Magnus would get upset, as he didn’t like the memories of his homeland much, but being there with Alec gave Magnus happy memories of homeland, and he’d claimed it was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for him. Magnus also taught him a little Indonesian, enough so Alec could whisper _aku cinta kamu_ in his ear before they slept, making Magnus shiver

Last year Magnus had thrown an extravagant party at Pandemonium for the Downworld (and a number of Shadowhunters that had nothing but respect for the Head of the Institute and his warlock husband), though the couple had actually spent most of the night making out upstairs. Made for an interesting situation when their son Max had walked in when things between them were heating up. Magnus could still hear the boy screaming as he ran out of the room. Alec had been mortified but Magnus had just laughed. It wasn’t the first time Max had walked in on them in compromising positions, but Max himself had a new boyfriend and Magnus had walked in on them on more than one occasion when their son had been visiting his folks.

“Next year we should go back to Paris.” Magnus suggested. “You always like it there,”

“Only because it’s sexy to watch you speak French,” Alec smirked.

Magnus laughed. “In that case we should go to Venice again, because it’s sexy watching you speak Italian.”

“I don’t care where in the world we are Magnus, as long as I have you here,” Alec smiled, pulling the warlock close and kissing him.

Magnus melted into the kiss with a moan. It was incredible that after so many centuries of being together, Alec still made his heart flutter and his body heat up at his touch and his kisses. Magnus felt himself fall deeper in love with Alec after each decade that passed. He hoped Alec felt the same.

“It’s late, we should sleep.” Magnus murmured. “You can ravish me in the morning before Simon and Raphael arrive.”

“I’d rather ravage you now, but alright.” Alec relented, allowing Magnus to slip from his arms and into their bedroom.

They slept soundly, and Magnus woke up to Alec leaning over him, brushing the hair from his eyes tenderly. Magnus smiled up at him, reaching up to pull him down for a kiss.

“Guess what today is,” Alec murmured.

Magnus chuckled softly. “Tell me,” he said.

Alec grinned. “One thousand years exactly,” he replied. “I told you so Magnus,”

“Oh you – you sentimental fool! You romantic dork you – you’ve been waiting all this time to say that haven’t you?” Magnus cried.

Alec laughed. “Yes I have. And I still love you. I’ve loved you for a thousand years Magnus, and I’ll love you for a thousand more.”

“Oh Alexander,” Magnus murmured, rolling over to face him, pressing himself close to him as they kissed. “I love you so much,”

Alec smiled against his lips, whispering his love back as he kissed him again. He really would love this warlock forever. And maybe, just maybe, Magnus was starting to believe him.


End file.
